- 1
Voltaire - When You're Evil
- 2
Voltaire - Almost Human
- 3
Voltaire - Zombie Prostitute
- 4
Voltaire - Day Of The Dead
- 5
Voltaire - Goodnight, Demon Slayer
- 6
Voltaire - The Night
- 7
Voltaire - The USS Make Shit Up
- 8
Voltaire - The Vampire Club
- 9
Voltaire - Born Bad
- 10
Voltaire - Brains
- 11
Voltaire - Human Nature
- 12
Voltaire - Land Of The Dead
- 13
Voltaire - The Chosen
- 14
Voltaire - The Conqueror Worm
- 15
Voltaire - The Dirtiest Song That Ain't
- 16
Voltaire - Accordion Player
- 17
Voltaire - All Women Are Crazy
- 18
Voltaire - Anastasia
- 19
Voltaire - Bachelor(ette)
- 20
Voltaire - Believe
- 21
Voltaire - Bunnypocalypse
- 22
Voltaire - Cannibal Buffet
- 23
Voltaire - Cathouse Tragedy
- 24
Voltaire - Caught A Lite Sneeze
- 25
Voltaire - Come Sweet Death
- 26
Voltaire - Comin' out this Christmas
- 27
Voltaire - Crusade
- 28
Voltaire - Dead
- 29
Voltaire - Dead Girls
- 30
Voltaire - Don't Go By The River
- 31
Voltaire - El Barquito de Nuez
- 32
Voltaire - Ex Lover's Lover
- 33
Voltaire - Fear And Anguish
- 34
Voltaire - Feathery Wings
- 35
Voltaire - Future Ex Girlfriend
- 36
Voltaire - God Thinks
- 37
Voltaire - Hell In A Handbasket
- 38
Voltaire - I Am Rammstein!
- 39
Voltaire - Innocent
- 40
Voltaire - Irresponsible
- 41
Voltaire - Its Bigger On the Inside
- 42
Voltaire - Let It Go
- 43
Voltaire - Life
- 44
Voltaire - Oh My Goth!
- 45
Voltaire - Oh, Lord, Wake The Dead!
- 46
Voltaire - On The Road
- 47
Voltaire - Out Of Reach
- 48
Voltaire - Oweee
- 49
Voltaire - Robber Barron
- 50
Voltaire - Sacrifice
- 51
Voltaire - Snakes
- 52
Voltaire - So, You're Offended
- 53
Voltaire - Stakes And Torches (The Uprising Of The Peasants)
- 54
Voltaire - Stille
- 55
Voltaire - Stubborn As a Mule
- 56
Voltaire - The Devil And Mr. Jones
- 57
Voltaire - The Happy Song
- 58
Voltaire - The Headless Waltz
- 59
Voltaire - The Masquerade
- 60
Voltaire - The Mechanical Girl
- 61
Voltaire - The Straight Razor Cabaret
- 62
Voltaire - They Know Me
- 63
Voltaire - This Ship's Going Down
- 64
Voltaire - When The Circus Came To Town
- 65
Voltaire - Where's The Girl
- 66
Voltaire - Wie Du Willst
- 67
Voltaire - Worf's Revenge
- 68
Voltaire - #1 Fan
- 69
Voltaire - About A Girl
- 70
Voltaire - Alchemy Mondays
- 71
Voltaire - All The Way Down
- 72
Voltaire - Anniversary
- 73
Voltaire - Asche
- 74
Voltaire - Augen zu
- 75
Voltaire - BiTrektual
- 76
Voltaire - Blue-eyed Matador
- 77
Voltaire - Bomb New Jersey
- 78
Voltaire - Cantina
- 79
Voltaire - Captains All
- 80
Voltaire - Chupando
- 81
Voltaire - Coin Operated Goi
- 82
Voltaire - Death Death (Devil, Devil, Devil, Devil, Evil, Evil, Evil Evil Song)
- 83
Voltaire - Dia de Los Muertos
- 84
Voltaire - Dummy
- 85
Voltaire - Dunce
- 86
Voltaire - Flut
- 87
Voltaire - Graveyard Picnic
- 88
Voltaire - Hallo Eslkan Min
- 89
Voltaire - Happy Birthday (My Olde Friend)
- 90
Voltaire - Hate Lives In a Small Town
- 91
Voltaire - Hello Cruel World
- 92
Voltaire - I'm Sorry
- 93
Voltaire - If I only were a goth
- 94
Voltaire - It's Normal For a Man
- 95
Voltaire - Kaputt
- 96
Voltaire - Leaves in the Stream
- 97
Voltaire - Lovesong
- 98
Voltaire - Never
- 99
Voltaire - Parade
- 100
Voltaire - Raised By Bats
- 101
Voltaire - Ravens Land
- 102
Voltaire - Reggae Mortis
- 103
Voltaire - Riding a Black Unicorn
- 104
Voltaire - Ringo No Uta
- 105
Voltaire - Screw The Okampa (I Want To Go Home)
- 106
Voltaire - See You In Hell
- 107
Voltaire - Stuck With You
- 108
Voltaire - The Beast Of Pirate's Bay
- 109
Voltaire - The Churchyard
- 110
Voltaire - The Industrial Revolution (And How It Ruined My Life)
- 111
Voltaire - The Last Word
- 112
Voltaire - The Man Upstairs
- 113
Voltaire - The Ones Who've Hurt You
- 114
Voltaire - The Sexy Data Tango
- 115
Voltaire - This Sea
- 116
Voltaire - To The Bottom Of The Sea
- 117
Voltaire - Tür
- 118
Voltaire - Underground
- 119
Voltaire - Vagina Song
- 120
Voltaire - Vampir
- 121
Voltaire - Wake Up
- 122
Voltaire - Wall Of Pride
- 123
Voltaire - Welcome To The World
- 124
Voltaire - When You're Dead
- 125
Voltaire - Wo?
- 126
Voltaire - You Married a Fool
- 127
Voltaire - Zu Schön
When You're Dead
Voltaire
And I passed a crusty house of crumuchen on our street.
Now every town has got one, so I'm sure you'll understand,
when I tell you this old bastard is a mean and bitter man!
Now this day was special, I was wearing my new hat.
The old kamuchen saw this and he disapproved of that.
He said 'I've had one just like it, for 10 years!
You ripped me off!
You've got no right to wear a hat like mine, so take it off!'
Now as it happens, I'm a gentleman, so I approached his porch.
I told him great minds think alike, and you have one, of course.
So how 'bout I just tip my hat to you and I come on through?
He reached down for his gun and said 'I'll shoot you if you do!'
And I said no ones gonna cry at your funeral!
No ones gonna drink at your wake!
No ones gonna sigh with a tear in their eye!
'cos no ones gonna miss you when you're dead!
Well the next day I forgot this whole damn mess and went to town.
And there I saw a 100 or so posters all around.
And on them was my face, and I was wearing my new hat.
And there it read,
'This guy ripped me off! I've got one just like that!'
I took a walk down to his face to see if I could find
a way to show him that we're kichet spirits of the mind.
I said I didn't make these hats, and nor did you, of course.
And hey! We both love Johnny Cash. He said 'Get off my porch!'
and I said no ones gonna cry at your funeral!
No ones gonna drink at your wake!
No ones gonna sigh with a tear in their eye!
'cos no ones gonna miss you when you're dead!
When you look bad on your life, what will you see?
Did you spend your time mending fences or planting mines?
There is no shortage of potential enemies.
So don't waste much time, pushing away your kind!
I thought I must be stupid or just crazy from the heat,
when I went down to the house of that crumuchen on my street.
Maybe it was foolish to go to his hosue again.
Just to show this crazy, drunken fool he has a friend!
When I got there, much to my surprise, he wasn't there.
He was gone, as was his shotgun and his rocking chair.
I asked the neighbour lady who was laying on her lawn
'What happened to that mean old man?'
She shrugged and that was all!
And I said no ones gonna cry at your funeral!
No ones gonna drink at your wake!
No ones gonna sigh with a tear in their eye!
'cos no ones gonna miss you!
Hell, no one's gonna notice!
And I'll enjoy the silence!
When! You're! Dead!