- 1
Voltaire - When You're Evil
- 2
Voltaire - The Night
- 3
Voltaire - Brains
- 4
Voltaire - God Thinks
- 5
Voltaire - Almost Human
- 6
Voltaire - Happy Birthday (My Olde Friend)
- 7
Voltaire - Death Death (Devil, Devil, Devil, Devil, Evil, Evil, Evil Evil Song)
- 8
Voltaire - Dunce
- 9
Voltaire - Human Nature
- 10
Voltaire - Zombie Prostitute
- 11
Voltaire - Anastasia
- 12
Voltaire - BiTrektual
- 13
Voltaire - Cantina
- 14
Voltaire - Dead Girls
- 15
Voltaire - Don't Go By The River
- 16
Voltaire - It's Normal For a Man
- 17
Voltaire - Its Bigger On the Inside
- 18
Voltaire - Stubborn As a Mule
- 19
Voltaire - The Industrial Revolution (And How It Ruined My Life)
- 20
Voltaire - The Ones Who've Hurt You
- 21
Voltaire - Wall Of Pride
- 22
Voltaire - All Women Are Crazy
- 23
Voltaire - Bomb New Jersey
- 24
Voltaire - Bunnypocalypse
- 25
Voltaire - Cathouse Tragedy
- 26
Voltaire - Coin Operated Goi
- 27
Voltaire - Crusade
- 28
Voltaire - Dia de Los Muertos
- 29
Voltaire - Dummy
- 30
Voltaire - Ex Lover's Lover
- 31
Voltaire - Future Ex Girlfriend
- 32
Voltaire - Goodnight, Demon Slayer
- 33
Voltaire - Graveyard Picnic
- 34
Voltaire - Hate Lives In a Small Town
- 35
Voltaire - Hell In A Handbasket
- 36
Voltaire - Land Of The Dead
- 37
Voltaire - Let It Go
- 38
Voltaire - Life
- 39
Voltaire - Lovesong
- 40
Voltaire - Never
- 41
Voltaire - On The Road
- 42
Voltaire - Out Of Reach
- 43
Voltaire - Parade
- 44
Voltaire - Reggae Mortis
- 45
Voltaire - Riding a Black Unicorn
- 46
Voltaire - Sacrifice
- 47
Voltaire - So, You're Offended
- 48
Voltaire - Stakes And Torches (The Uprising Of The Peasants)
- 49
Voltaire - Stuck With You
- 50
Voltaire - The Chosen
- 51
Voltaire - The Conqueror Worm
- 52
Voltaire - The Devil And Mr. Jones
- 53
Voltaire - The Dirtiest Song That Ain't
- 54
Voltaire - The Happy Song
- 55
Voltaire - The Man Upstairs
- 56
Voltaire - The Sexy Data Tango
- 57
Voltaire - The Vampire Club
- 58
Voltaire - They Know Me
- 59
Voltaire - This Sea
- 60
Voltaire - To The Bottom Of The Sea
- 61
Voltaire - Underground
- 62
Voltaire - Worf's Revenge
- 63
Voltaire - You Married a Fool
- 64
Voltaire - Zu Schön
- 65
Voltaire - #1 Fan
- 66
Voltaire - About A Girl
- 67
Voltaire - Accordion Player
- 68
Voltaire - Alchemy Mondays
- 69
Voltaire - All The Way Down
- 70
Voltaire - Anniversary
- 71
Voltaire - Asche
- 72
Voltaire - Augen zu
- 73
Voltaire - Bachelor(ette)
- 74
Voltaire - Believe
- 75
Voltaire - Blue-eyed Matador
- 76
Voltaire - Born Bad
- 77
Voltaire - Cannibal Buffet
- 78
Voltaire - Captains All
- 79
Voltaire - Caught A Lite Sneeze
- 80
Voltaire - Chupando
- 81
Voltaire - Come Sweet Death
- 82
Voltaire - Comin' out this Christmas
- 83
Voltaire - Day Of The Dead
- 84
Voltaire - Dead
- 85
Voltaire - El Barquito de Nuez
- 86
Voltaire - Fear And Anguish
- 87
Voltaire - Feathery Wings
- 88
Voltaire - Flut
- 89
Voltaire - Hallo Eslkan Min
- 90
Voltaire - Hello Cruel World
- 91
Voltaire - I Am Rammstein!
- 92
Voltaire - I'm Sorry
- 93
Voltaire - If I only were a goth
- 94
Voltaire - Innocent
- 95
Voltaire - Irresponsible
- 96
Voltaire - Kaputt
- 97
Voltaire - Leaves in the Stream
- 98
Voltaire - Oh My Goth!
- 99
Voltaire - Oh, Lord, Wake The Dead!
- 100
Voltaire - Oweee
- 101
Voltaire - Raised By Bats
- 102
Voltaire - Ravens Land
- 103
Voltaire - Ringo No Uta
- 104
Voltaire - Robber Barron
- 105
Voltaire - Screw The Okampa (I Want To Go Home)
- 106
Voltaire - See You In Hell
- 107
Voltaire - Snakes
- 108
Voltaire - Stille
- 109
Voltaire - The Beast Of Pirate's Bay
- 110
Voltaire - The Churchyard
- 111
Voltaire - The Headless Waltz
- 112
Voltaire - The Last Word
- 113
Voltaire - The Masquerade
- 114
Voltaire - The Mechanical Girl
- 115
Voltaire - The Straight Razor Cabaret
- 116
Voltaire - The USS Make Shit Up
- 117
Voltaire - This Ship's Going Down
- 118
Voltaire - Tür
- 119
Voltaire - Vagina Song
- 120
Voltaire - Vampir
- 121
Voltaire - Wake Up
- 122
Voltaire - Welcome To The World
- 123
Voltaire - When The Circus Came To Town
- 124
Voltaire - When You're Dead
- 125
Voltaire - Where's The Girl
- 126
Voltaire - Wie Du Willst
- 127
Voltaire - Wo?
When You're Dead
Voltaire
And I passed a crusty house of crumuchen on our street.
Now every town has got one, so I'm sure you'll understand,
when I tell you this old bastard is a mean and bitter man!
Now this day was special, I was wearing my new hat.
The old kamuchen saw this and he disapproved of that.
He said 'I've had one just like it, for 10 years!
You ripped me off!
You've got no right to wear a hat like mine, so take it off!'
Now as it happens, I'm a gentleman, so I approached his porch.
I told him great minds think alike, and you have one, of course.
So how 'bout I just tip my hat to you and I come on through?
He reached down for his gun and said 'I'll shoot you if you do!'
And I said no ones gonna cry at your funeral!
No ones gonna drink at your wake!
No ones gonna sigh with a tear in their eye!
'cos no ones gonna miss you when you're dead!
Well the next day I forgot this whole damn mess and went to town.
And there I saw a 100 or so posters all around.
And on them was my face, and I was wearing my new hat.
And there it read,
'This guy ripped me off! I've got one just like that!'
I took a walk down to his face to see if I could find
a way to show him that we're kichet spirits of the mind.
I said I didn't make these hats, and nor did you, of course.
And hey! We both love Johnny Cash. He said 'Get off my porch!'
and I said no ones gonna cry at your funeral!
No ones gonna drink at your wake!
No ones gonna sigh with a tear in their eye!
'cos no ones gonna miss you when you're dead!
When you look bad on your life, what will you see?
Did you spend your time mending fences or planting mines?
There is no shortage of potential enemies.
So don't waste much time, pushing away your kind!
I thought I must be stupid or just crazy from the heat,
when I went down to the house of that crumuchen on my street.
Maybe it was foolish to go to his hosue again.
Just to show this crazy, drunken fool he has a friend!
When I got there, much to my surprise, he wasn't there.
He was gone, as was his shotgun and his rocking chair.
I asked the neighbour lady who was laying on her lawn
'What happened to that mean old man?'
She shrugged and that was all!
And I said no ones gonna cry at your funeral!
No ones gonna drink at your wake!
No ones gonna sigh with a tear in their eye!
'cos no ones gonna miss you!
Hell, no one's gonna notice!
And I'll enjoy the silence!
When! You're! Dead!