- 1
Voltaire - When You're Evil
- 2
Voltaire - Death Death (Devil, Devil, Devil, Devil, Evil, Evil, Evil Evil Song)
- 3
Voltaire - Wake Up
- 4
Voltaire - Human Nature
- 5
Voltaire - The Night
- 6
Voltaire - Zombie Prostitute
- 7
Voltaire - Blue-eyed Matador
- 8
Voltaire - Born Bad
- 9
Voltaire - Brains
- 10
Voltaire - Cannibal Buffet
- 11
Voltaire - I'm Sorry
- 12
Voltaire - Oh My Goth!
- 13
Voltaire - The Straight Razor Cabaret
- 14
Voltaire - #1 Fan
- 15
Voltaire - All Women Are Crazy
- 16
Voltaire - Almost Human
- 17
Voltaire - Anniversary
- 18
Voltaire - Bachelor(ette)
- 19
Voltaire - Cathouse Tragedy
- 20
Voltaire - Come Sweet Death
- 21
Voltaire - Comin' out this Christmas
- 22
Voltaire - Crusade
- 23
Voltaire - Dead
- 24
Voltaire - Ex Lover's Lover
- 25
Voltaire - Fear And Anguish
- 26
Voltaire - Happy Birthday (My Olde Friend)
- 27
Voltaire - Hate Lives In a Small Town
- 28
Voltaire - I Am Rammstein!
- 29
Voltaire - If I only were a goth
- 30
Voltaire - Land Of The Dead
- 31
Voltaire - Lovesong
- 32
Voltaire - Oh, Lord, Wake The Dead!
- 33
Voltaire - Parade
- 34
Voltaire - Raised By Bats
- 35
Voltaire - Screw The Okampa (I Want To Go Home)
- 36
Voltaire - Stubborn As a Mule
- 37
Voltaire - The Beast Of Pirate's Bay
- 38
Voltaire - The Chosen
- 39
Voltaire - The Churchyard
- 40
Voltaire - The Devil And Mr. Jones
- 41
Voltaire - The Dirtiest Song That Ain't
- 42
Voltaire - The Industrial Revolution (And How It Ruined My Life)
- 43
Voltaire - The Last Word
- 44
Voltaire - The Mechanical Girl
- 45
Voltaire - The Ones Who've Hurt You
- 46
Voltaire - The Vampire Club
- 47
Voltaire - To The Bottom Of The Sea
- 48
Voltaire - Worf's Revenge
- 49
Voltaire - About A Girl
- 50
Voltaire - Accordion Player
- 51
Voltaire - Alchemy Mondays
- 52
Voltaire - All The Way Down
- 53
Voltaire - Anastasia
- 54
Voltaire - Asche
- 55
Voltaire - Augen zu
- 56
Voltaire - Believe
- 57
Voltaire - BiTrektual
- 58
Voltaire - Bomb New Jersey
- 59
Voltaire - Bunnypocalypse
- 60
Voltaire - Cantina
- 61
Voltaire - Captains All
- 62
Voltaire - Caught A Lite Sneeze
- 63
Voltaire - Chupando
- 64
Voltaire - Coin Operated Goi
- 65
Voltaire - Day Of The Dead
- 66
Voltaire - Dead Girls
- 67
Voltaire - Dia de Los Muertos
- 68
Voltaire - Don't Go By The River
- 69
Voltaire - Dummy
- 70
Voltaire - Dunce
- 71
Voltaire - El Barquito de Nuez
- 72
Voltaire - Feathery Wings
- 73
Voltaire - Flut
- 74
Voltaire - Future Ex Girlfriend
- 75
Voltaire - God Thinks
- 76
Voltaire - Goodnight, Demon Slayer
- 77
Voltaire - Graveyard Picnic
- 78
Voltaire - Hallo Eslkan Min
- 79
Voltaire - Hell In A Handbasket
- 80
Voltaire - Hello Cruel World
- 81
Voltaire - Innocent
- 82
Voltaire - Irresponsible
- 83
Voltaire - It's Normal For a Man
- 84
Voltaire - Its Bigger On the Inside
- 85
Voltaire - Kaputt
- 86
Voltaire - Leaves in the Stream
- 87
Voltaire - Let It Go
- 88
Voltaire - Life
- 89
Voltaire - Never
- 90
Voltaire - On The Road
- 91
Voltaire - Out Of Reach
- 92
Voltaire - Oweee
- 93
Voltaire - Ravens Land
- 94
Voltaire - Reggae Mortis
- 95
Voltaire - Riding a Black Unicorn
- 96
Voltaire - Ringo No Uta
- 97
Voltaire - Robber Barron
- 98
Voltaire - Sacrifice
- 99
Voltaire - See You In Hell
- 100
Voltaire - Snakes
- 101
Voltaire - So, You're Offended
- 102
Voltaire - Stakes And Torches (The Uprising Of The Peasants)
- 103
Voltaire - Stille
- 104
Voltaire - Stuck With You
- 105
Voltaire - The Conqueror Worm
- 106
Voltaire - The Happy Song
- 107
Voltaire - The Headless Waltz
- 108
Voltaire - The Man Upstairs
- 109
Voltaire - The Masquerade
- 110
Voltaire - The Sexy Data Tango
- 111
Voltaire - The USS Make Shit Up
- 112
Voltaire - They Know Me
- 113
Voltaire - This Sea
- 114
Voltaire - This Ship's Going Down
- 115
Voltaire - Tür
- 116
Voltaire - Underground
- 117
Voltaire - Vagina Song
- 118
Voltaire - Vampir
- 119
Voltaire - Wall Of Pride
- 120
Voltaire - Welcome To The World
- 121
Voltaire - When The Circus Came To Town
- 122
Voltaire - When You're Dead
- 123
Voltaire - Where's The Girl
- 124
Voltaire - Wie Du Willst
- 125
Voltaire - Wo?
- 126
Voltaire - You Married a Fool
- 127
Voltaire - Zu Schön
When You're Dead
Voltaire
And I passed a crusty house of crumuchen on our street.
Now every town has got one, so I'm sure you'll understand,
when I tell you this old bastard is a mean and bitter man!
Now this day was special, I was wearing my new hat.
The old kamuchen saw this and he disapproved of that.
He said 'I've had one just like it, for 10 years!
You ripped me off!
You've got no right to wear a hat like mine, so take it off!'
Now as it happens, I'm a gentleman, so I approached his porch.
I told him great minds think alike, and you have one, of course.
So how 'bout I just tip my hat to you and I come on through?
He reached down for his gun and said 'I'll shoot you if you do!'
And I said no ones gonna cry at your funeral!
No ones gonna drink at your wake!
No ones gonna sigh with a tear in their eye!
'cos no ones gonna miss you when you're dead!
Well the next day I forgot this whole damn mess and went to town.
And there I saw a 100 or so posters all around.
And on them was my face, and I was wearing my new hat.
And there it read,
'This guy ripped me off! I've got one just like that!'
I took a walk down to his face to see if I could find
a way to show him that we're kichet spirits of the mind.
I said I didn't make these hats, and nor did you, of course.
And hey! We both love Johnny Cash. He said 'Get off my porch!'
and I said no ones gonna cry at your funeral!
No ones gonna drink at your wake!
No ones gonna sigh with a tear in their eye!
'cos no ones gonna miss you when you're dead!
When you look bad on your life, what will you see?
Did you spend your time mending fences or planting mines?
There is no shortage of potential enemies.
So don't waste much time, pushing away your kind!
I thought I must be stupid or just crazy from the heat,
when I went down to the house of that crumuchen on my street.
Maybe it was foolish to go to his hosue again.
Just to show this crazy, drunken fool he has a friend!
When I got there, much to my surprise, he wasn't there.
He was gone, as was his shotgun and his rocking chair.
I asked the neighbour lady who was laying on her lawn
'What happened to that mean old man?'
She shrugged and that was all!
And I said no ones gonna cry at your funeral!
No ones gonna drink at your wake!
No ones gonna sigh with a tear in their eye!
'cos no ones gonna miss you!
Hell, no one's gonna notice!
And I'll enjoy the silence!
When! You're! Dead!