- 1
Voltaire - When You're Evil
- 2
Voltaire - The Night
- 3
Voltaire - Almost Human
- 4
Voltaire - Death Death (Devil, Devil, Devil, Devil, Evil, Evil, Evil Evil Song)
- 5
Voltaire - Hell In A Handbasket
- 6
Voltaire - Riding a Black Unicorn
- 7
Voltaire - Zombie Prostitute
- 8
Voltaire - Chupando
- 9
Voltaire - Day Of The Dead
- 10
Voltaire - Ex Lover's Lover
- 11
Voltaire - Goodnight, Demon Slayer
- 12
Voltaire - Hate Lives In a Small Town
- 13
Voltaire - Stubborn As a Mule
- 14
Voltaire - The Industrial Revolution (And How It Ruined My Life)
- 15
Voltaire - The Mechanical Girl
- 16
Voltaire - The Straight Razor Cabaret
- 17
Voltaire - This Ship's Going Down
- 18
Voltaire - When The Circus Came To Town
- 19
Voltaire - Where's The Girl
- 20
Voltaire - About A Girl
- 21
Voltaire - All Women Are Crazy
- 22
Voltaire - Anastasia
- 23
Voltaire - Anniversary
- 24
Voltaire - Brains
- 25
Voltaire - Cantina
- 26
Voltaire - Cathouse Tragedy
- 27
Voltaire - Dead Girls
- 28
Voltaire - Dia de Los Muertos
- 29
Voltaire - Don't Go By The River
- 30
Voltaire - Fear And Anguish
- 31
Voltaire - Feathery Wings
- 32
Voltaire - Future Ex Girlfriend
- 33
Voltaire - God Thinks
- 34
Voltaire - Human Nature
- 35
Voltaire - I Am Rammstein!
- 36
Voltaire - It's Normal For a Man
- 37
Voltaire - Oh, Lord, Wake The Dead!
- 38
Voltaire - Parade
- 39
Voltaire - Raised By Bats
- 40
Voltaire - Ravens Land
- 41
Voltaire - This Sea
- 42
Voltaire - To The Bottom Of The Sea
- 43
Voltaire - #1 Fan
- 44
Voltaire - Accordion Player
- 45
Voltaire - Alchemy Mondays
- 46
Voltaire - All The Way Down
- 47
Voltaire - Asche
- 48
Voltaire - Augen zu
- 49
Voltaire - Bachelor(ette)
- 50
Voltaire - Believe
- 51
Voltaire - BiTrektual
- 52
Voltaire - Blue-eyed Matador
- 53
Voltaire - Bomb New Jersey
- 54
Voltaire - Born Bad
- 55
Voltaire - Bunnypocalypse
- 56
Voltaire - Cannibal Buffet
- 57
Voltaire - Captains All
- 58
Voltaire - Caught A Lite Sneeze
- 59
Voltaire - Coin Operated Goi
- 60
Voltaire - Come Sweet Death
- 61
Voltaire - Comin' out this Christmas
- 62
Voltaire - Crusade
- 63
Voltaire - Dead
- 64
Voltaire - Dummy
- 65
Voltaire - Dunce
- 66
Voltaire - El Barquito de Nuez
- 67
Voltaire - Flut
- 68
Voltaire - Graveyard Picnic
- 69
Voltaire - Hallo Eslkan Min
- 70
Voltaire - Happy Birthday (My Olde Friend)
- 71
Voltaire - Hello Cruel World
- 72
Voltaire - I'm Sorry
- 73
Voltaire - If I only were a goth
- 74
Voltaire - Innocent
- 75
Voltaire - Irresponsible
- 76
Voltaire - Its Bigger On the Inside
- 77
Voltaire - Kaputt
- 78
Voltaire - Land Of The Dead
- 79
Voltaire - Leaves in the Stream
- 80
Voltaire - Let It Go
- 81
Voltaire - Life
- 82
Voltaire - Lovesong
- 83
Voltaire - Never
- 84
Voltaire - Oh My Goth!
- 85
Voltaire - On The Road
- 86
Voltaire - Out Of Reach
- 87
Voltaire - Oweee
- 88
Voltaire - Reggae Mortis
- 89
Voltaire - Ringo No Uta
- 90
Voltaire - Robber Barron
- 91
Voltaire - Sacrifice
- 92
Voltaire - Screw The Okampa (I Want To Go Home)
- 93
Voltaire - See You In Hell
- 94
Voltaire - Snakes
- 95
Voltaire - So, You're Offended
- 96
Voltaire - Stakes And Torches (The Uprising Of The Peasants)
- 97
Voltaire - Stille
- 98
Voltaire - Stuck With You
- 99
Voltaire - The Beast Of Pirate's Bay
- 100
Voltaire - The Chosen
- 101
Voltaire - The Churchyard
- 102
Voltaire - The Conqueror Worm
- 103
Voltaire - The Devil And Mr. Jones
- 104
Voltaire - The Dirtiest Song That Ain't
- 105
Voltaire - The Happy Song
- 106
Voltaire - The Headless Waltz
- 107
Voltaire - The Last Word
- 108
Voltaire - The Man Upstairs
- 109
Voltaire - The Masquerade
- 110
Voltaire - The Ones Who've Hurt You
- 111
Voltaire - The Sexy Data Tango
- 112
Voltaire - The USS Make Shit Up
- 113
Voltaire - The Vampire Club
- 114
Voltaire - They Know Me
- 115
Voltaire - Tür
- 116
Voltaire - Underground
- 117
Voltaire - Vagina Song
- 118
Voltaire - Vampir
- 119
Voltaire - Wake Up
- 120
Voltaire - Wall Of Pride
- 121
Voltaire - Welcome To The World
- 122
Voltaire - When You're Dead
- 123
Voltaire - Wie Du Willst
- 124
Voltaire - Wo?
- 125
Voltaire - Worf's Revenge
- 126
Voltaire - You Married a Fool
- 127
Voltaire - Zu Schön
When You're Dead
Voltaire
And I passed a crusty house of crumuchen on our street.
Now every town has got one, so I'm sure you'll understand,
when I tell you this old bastard is a mean and bitter man!
Now this day was special, I was wearing my new hat.
The old kamuchen saw this and he disapproved of that.
He said 'I've had one just like it, for 10 years!
You ripped me off!
You've got no right to wear a hat like mine, so take it off!'
Now as it happens, I'm a gentleman, so I approached his porch.
I told him great minds think alike, and you have one, of course.
So how 'bout I just tip my hat to you and I come on through?
He reached down for his gun and said 'I'll shoot you if you do!'
And I said no ones gonna cry at your funeral!
No ones gonna drink at your wake!
No ones gonna sigh with a tear in their eye!
'cos no ones gonna miss you when you're dead!
Well the next day I forgot this whole damn mess and went to town.
And there I saw a 100 or so posters all around.
And on them was my face, and I was wearing my new hat.
And there it read,
'This guy ripped me off! I've got one just like that!'
I took a walk down to his face to see if I could find
a way to show him that we're kichet spirits of the mind.
I said I didn't make these hats, and nor did you, of course.
And hey! We both love Johnny Cash. He said 'Get off my porch!'
and I said no ones gonna cry at your funeral!
No ones gonna drink at your wake!
No ones gonna sigh with a tear in their eye!
'cos no ones gonna miss you when you're dead!
When you look bad on your life, what will you see?
Did you spend your time mending fences or planting mines?
There is no shortage of potential enemies.
So don't waste much time, pushing away your kind!
I thought I must be stupid or just crazy from the heat,
when I went down to the house of that crumuchen on my street.
Maybe it was foolish to go to his hosue again.
Just to show this crazy, drunken fool he has a friend!
When I got there, much to my surprise, he wasn't there.
He was gone, as was his shotgun and his rocking chair.
I asked the neighbour lady who was laying on her lawn
'What happened to that mean old man?'
She shrugged and that was all!
And I said no ones gonna cry at your funeral!
No ones gonna drink at your wake!
No ones gonna sigh with a tear in their eye!
'cos no ones gonna miss you!
Hell, no one's gonna notice!
And I'll enjoy the silence!
When! You're! Dead!