How'd you do? I
See you've met my faithful handyman
He's just a little brought down
Because when you knocked
He thought you were the candyman
Don't get strung out
By the way I look
Don't judge a book by its cover
I'm not much of a man
By the light of day
But by night
I'm one hell of a lover
I'm just a sweet transvestite
From Transexual, Transylvania
Let me show you around
Maybe play you a song
You look like you're both pretty groovy
Or if you want something visual
That's not too abysmal
We could take in an old Steve Reeves movie
I'm glad we caught you at home
Could we use your phone?
We're both in a bit of a hurry
We'll just say where we are
Then go back to the car
We don't want to be any worry
So you got caught with a flat
Well, how about that?
Well, babies, don't you panic
By the light of the night
When it all seems alright
I'll get you a satanic mechanic
I'm just a sweet transvestite
From Transexual, Transylvania
So why don't you stay for the night?
Or maybe a bite?
I could show you my favourite obsession
I've been making a man
With blond hair and a tan
And he's good for relieving my tension
I'm just a sweet transvestite
From Transexual, Transylvania
I'm just a sweet transvestite
From Transexual, Transylvania
So, come up to the lab
And see what's on the slab
I see you shiver with anticipation!
But maybe the rain isn't really to blame
So I'll remove the cause
But not the symptom
