1. 1

    Stephen Lynch - 3 Balloons

  2. 2

    Stephen Lynch - A Month Dead

  3. 3

    Stephen Lynch - Baby

  4. 4

    Stephen Lynch - Ballad Of Scarface

  5. 5

    Stephen Lynch - Beelz

  6. 6

    Stephen Lynch - Best Friends Song

  7. 7

    Stephen Lynch - Bitch

  8. 8

    Stephen Lynch - Lion

  9. 9

    Stephen Lynch - Dear Diary 3

  10. 10

    Stephen Lynch - Hallelujah

  11. 11

    Stephen Lynch - Tennessee

  12. 12

    Stephen Lynch - Then She Farted

  13. 13

    Stephen Lynch - Albino

  14. 14

    Stephen Lynch - America

  15. 15

    Stephen Lynch - Bowling Song (Almighty Malachi, Professional Bowling God)

  16. 16

    Stephen Lynch - Classic Rock Song

  17. 17

    Stephen Lynch - Country Love Song

  18. 18

    Stephen Lynch - Craig

  19. 19

    Stephen Lynch - Crazy Peanuts

  20. 20

    Stephen Lynch - D&D

  21. 21

    Stephen Lynch - Dear Diary 1

  22. 22

    Stephen Lynch - Dear Diary 2

  23. 23

    Stephen Lynch - Dear Diary 4

  24. 24

    Stephen Lynch - Down To The Old Pub Instead

  25. 25

    Stephen Lynch - Dr. Stephen

  26. 26

    Stephen Lynch - Drink You Pretty

  27. 27

    Stephen Lynch - Fishin' Hole

  28. 28

    Stephen Lynch - For Me

  29. 29

    Stephen Lynch - For The Ladies

  30. 30

    Stephen Lynch - Gay

  31. 31

    Stephen Lynch - Gerbil Song

  32. 32

    Stephen Lynch - Grandfather Die

  33. 33

    Stephen Lynch - Hair

  34. 34

    Stephen Lynch - Half a Man

  35. 35

    Stephen Lynch - Halloween

  36. 36

    Stephen Lynch - Hermaphrodite

  37. 37

    Stephen Lynch - Hey Love

  38. 38

    Stephen Lynch - History Lesson

  39. 39

    Stephen Lynch - I Wanna F Your Sister

  40. 40

    Stephen Lynch - If I Were Gay

  41. 41

    Stephen Lynch - In Defense Of A Peepshow Girl

  42. 42

    Stephen Lynch - Jim Henson's Dead

  43. 43

    Stephen Lynch - Kill A Kitten

  44. 44

    Stephen Lynch - Let Me Inside

  45. 45

    Stephen Lynch - Little Tiny Mustache

  46. 46

    Stephen Lynch - Lorelei

  47. 47

    Stephen Lynch - Love Song

  48. 48

    Stephen Lynch - Lullaby (Divorce Song)

  49. 49

    Stephen Lynch - Mixer at Delta Chi

  50. 50

    Stephen Lynch - Mother's Day

  51. 51

    Stephen Lynch - No Meat

  52. 52

    Stephen Lynch - Not Home

  53. 53

    Stephen Lynch - Oh BinLadin

  54. 54

    Stephen Lynch - Pierre

  55. 55

    Stephen Lynch - Priest

  56. 56

    Stephen Lynch - R.D.C. (Opie's Lament)

  57. 57

    Stephen Lynch - She Gotta Smile

  58. 58

    Stephen Lynch - So This Is Outer Space?

  59. 59

    Stephen Lynch - Special

  60. 60

    Stephen Lynch - Special Fred

  61. 61

    Stephen Lynch - Special Olympics

  62. 62

    Stephen Lynch - Superhero

  63. 63

    Stephen Lynch - Talk To Me

  64. 64

    Stephen Lynch - Tall Glass O' Water

  65. 65

    Stephen Lynch - Tattoo

  66. 66

    Stephen Lynch - Taxi Driver

  67. 67

    Stephen Lynch - The Gathering

  68. 68

    Stephen Lynch - The Night I Laid You Down

  69. 69

    Stephen Lynch - Too Jesusy

  70. 70

    Stephen Lynch - Vanilla Ice Cream

  71. 71

    Stephen Lynch - Voices In My Head

  72. 72

    Stephen Lynch - Waiting

  73. 73

    Stephen Lynch - Walken I

  74. 74

    Stephen Lynch - Walken II

  75. 75

    Stephen Lynch - What If The Guy From Smashing Pumpkings Lost His Car Keys

  76. 76

    Stephen Lynch - Whiskey Dick

  77. 77

    Stephen Lynch - Whittlin' Man

  78. 78

    Stephen Lynch - You (Prettier Than)

  79. 79

    Stephen Lynch - You Caught Me Spankin It

  80. 80

    Stephen Lynch - You'll Do

Fishin' Hole

Stephen Lynch

Wanna have some quality time with my son
So I brought him down to the fishin' hole
Didn't like the feelin' of that worm in his hand
Got mad, threw down his fishin' pole

Said, "That's alright, son. Let's go and get an ice cream"
"Let your old man buy you a treat"
But he didn't like no flavors up upon that wall
Started crying, and ran into the street...

He's an asshole, my kid's an asshole
I swear it just don't float my boat
Always crying, always crying
Made me wanna punch him in his little throat
Called my lady up to tell her what had happened
How our son had run away
She said, "Don't worry, baby, I will talk to him"
"And everything will be okay"

My lady's an asshole, she's an asshole
Her assholishness is off the charts
Always perfect, always perfect
Made me wanna punch her in her lady-parts

I decided I'd go down to the bar
And drown my sorrows in a beer
But the sign outside said 'Closed For Renovations'
'We'll open up again next year'...

That bar is an asshole, it's an asshole
Oh, the worst bar in the land!
Always closing, always closing
Can't punch a bar, cause you'll hurt your hand
I went home to forget about my troubles
Sat down in my favorite eazy chair
But I couldn't relax from the pain I was feelin'
As my hemorrhoid began to flair...

My asshole's an asshole, a real butthole
Needs to put his asshole-self in check!
Always burning, always itching
Made me wanna punch him in his asshole neck

Late one night, lyin' awake in bed
Mmmm, a realization came
Are there really assholes everywhere I look?
Or am I the one to blame?
Maybe I just do not say the things I should say
And I don't do the things I ought
So I took a good, hard look at myself in the mirror
And this is what I thought...
The guy who sold me this mirror is an asshole, he's an asshole
Son of a bitch said it was antique
He was lyin', he was lyin'
Made me wanna punch him in his salesman cheek

I'm on a real asshole streak
I could open up an asshole boutique
I think this song has reached it's peak
Goodbye, you assholes, see you next week!

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