1. 1

    La Dispute - King Park

  2. 2

    La Dispute - Said the King To the River

  3. 3

    La Dispute - Woman (In Mirror)

  4. 4

    La Dispute - Such Small Hands

  5. 5

    La Dispute - The Last Lost Continent

  6. 6

    La Dispute - Andria

  7. 7

    La Dispute - Fall Down, Never Get Back Up Again

  8. 8

    La Dispute - Extraordinary Dinner Party

  9. 9

    La Dispute - Hudsonville Mi

  10. 10

    La Dispute - Nobody, Not Even the Rain

  11. 11

    La Dispute - There You Are (Hiding Place)

  12. 12

    La Dispute - 35

  13. 13

    La Dispute - A Broken Jar

  14. 14

    La Dispute - All Our Bruised Bodies And The Whole Heart Shrinks

  15. 15

    La Dispute - Anxiety Panorama

  16. 16

    La Dispute - Edward Benz, 27 Times

  17. 17

    La Dispute - For Mayor in Splitsville

  18. 18

    La Dispute - Nine

  19. 19

    La Dispute - One

  20. 20

    La Dispute - Sad Prayers For Guilty Bodies

  21. 21

    La Dispute - Six

  22. 22

    La Dispute - The Most Beautiful Bitter Fruit

  23. 23

    La Dispute - Twas The Night Before Christmas

  24. 24

    La Dispute - View From Our Bedroom Window

  25. 25

    La Dispute - A

  26. 26

    La Dispute - A Departure

  27. 27

    La Dispute - A Letter

  28. 28

    La Dispute - A Poem

  29. 29

    La Dispute - A Word Of Welcome And Of Warning

  30. 30

    La Dispute - Bury Your Flames

  31. 31

    La Dispute - Damaged Goods

  32. 32

    La Dispute - Edit Your Hometown

  33. 33

    La Dispute - Eight

  34. 34

    La Dispute - Eleven

  35. 35

    La Dispute - Fairmount

  36. 36

    La Dispute - First Reactions After Falling Through the Ice

  37. 37

    La Dispute - Five

  38. 38

    La Dispute - Footsteps At The Pond

  39. 39

    La Dispute - Four

  40. 40

    La Dispute - Fulton Street I

  41. 41

    La Dispute - Fulton Street Ii

  42. 42

    La Dispute - Future Wars

  43. 43

    La Dispute - Harder Harmonies

  44. 44

    La Dispute - He Is Here, He Is Not Afraid

  45. 45

    La Dispute - How I Feel

  46. 46

    La Dispute - I See Everything

  47. 47

    La Dispute - In Northern Michigan

  48. 48

    La Dispute - Last Blues

  49. 49

    La Dispute - Last Blues For Bloody Knuckles

  50. 50

    La Dispute - New Storms For Older Lovers

  51. 51

    La Dispute - Objects In Space

  52. 52

    La Dispute - Only Everything Below

  53. 53

    La Dispute - Rhodonite And Grief

  54. 54

    La Dispute - Safer in the Forest / Love Song for Poor Michigan

  55. 55

    La Dispute - Scenes from Highways 1981-2009

  56. 56

    La Dispute - See You In Vancouver

  57. 57

    La Dispute - Seven

  58. 58

    La Dispute - Shall Never Lose It's Power

  59. 59

    La Dispute - St. Paul Missionary Baptist Church Blues

  60. 60

    La Dispute - Stay Happy There

  61. 61

    La Dispute - Sunday Morning, At a Funeral

  62. 62

    La Dispute - Ten

  63. 63

    La Dispute - The Castle Builders

  64. 64

    La Dispute - The Child We Lost

  65. 65

    La Dispute - The Surgeon And The Scientist

  66. 66

    La Dispute - Then Again, Maybe You Were Right

  67. 67

    La Dispute - Thirteen

  68. 68

    La Dispute - Three

  69. 69

    La Dispute - To Withstand The Force Of Storms

  70. 70

    La Dispute - Twelve

  71. 71

    La Dispute - Two

  72. 72

    La Dispute - Untitled

  73. 73

    La Dispute - Why It Scares Me

  74. 74

    La Dispute - Woman (Reading)

  75. 75

    La Dispute - You And I In Unison

  76. 76

    La Dispute - You Ascendant

The Most Beautiful Bitter Fruit

La Dispute

After sundown, before sleeping, i am the worst of me. i am a mess of these
Old themes and the murmur of half-dreams whisper seductively and
Stage scenes.
It's fear fiction, these visions, caught somewhere between delusion and prophesy.
What i haven't done, what i've wanted to, and what i fear you have
Becomes reality here.

Bright lights in the young night keep to the beat.
A classic party scene, crowded and interesting.
No love, no life, no history.
Just touch, just chemistry, just
A roaring undercurrent simple and sensory.
Young bodies, warm skin, perfect symmetry and
It's a moment, harmless. it's energy.
It's like medicine,
It's self-discovery.

See, all the secrets i keep, why are they secrets?

It's only temporary, that fleeting feeling of warmth,
Just a flash before the line gets blurry,
Between a longing for more than what the body wants now and
What the body wants now more than anything.
Was it integrity that kept my hands to myself or
Just the thought of getting too far ahead of you?
Was it that i got too tired of the consequence?
Or was i just scared?

I only know i never wanted to get left behind.

No pauses, not a second guess.
First a swaying then a stumble then a swagger.
They're just movements towards feeling. it doesn't matter
Neither hesitates to carry on a kind of energy,
Sweat and block out everything to
Find every aperture and compel the animal parts.
Fan flames, taste fruit, taste bitter fruit.
Just trying to learn how all the wires in the body work.
Just trying to feel it out, it's like medicine.
Trap the healing in whatever bed they end up in.

I want to feel it out. i want to know how it works.
I want to know if it was worth it to worry,
About the ghosts i feared would haunt the memory,
About the damage that i'm sure the fear has done to me now.
I want to know what it is in me that won't follow through
Those nights the instinct takes a hold of me and pushes too.
Maybe it's only that i've never gotten over you.

Or am i still scared?

I see the church steps, a vision. is there fiction in this one too?
It's true, i've made a tale of it here, still, it's a little unclear who's been haunting who.
And time can be such a funny thing, always moving to the future
Glorifying the past and amplifying the pain in frames and glass.
So was our touch half as sacred as i've made it seem
Or just another fabrication of a half-dream?
Just those chemicals, the adolescent love.
Just us trying to grasp onto meaning,
Onto a purpose,
Onto a sense that
Something spiritual releases when the feeling hits.

And when the feeling hits.

And in that moment sparks and harps play out
A sweeping melody through fog and fantasy
And in that moment there's an honesty instinctive and pure but
It departs like it came, rapid and bearing no more
Than fleeting ecstasy of natural harmony.
They fear the notes being played and try to sing along.
Don't be ashamed, be free to the feeling. don't be ashamed, keep feeling.
But find it: a body that makes sense.

I've felt it.

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