- 1
Frank Zappa - Uncle Remus
- 2
Frank Zappa - Bobby Brown Goes Down
- 3
Frank Zappa - Bobby Brown
- 4
Frank Zappa - Joe's Garage
- 5
Frank Zappa - Muffin Man
- 6
Frank Zappa - Cosmik Debris
- 7
Frank Zappa - Inca Roads
- 8
Frank Zappa - Peaches En Regalia
- 9
Frank Zappa - The Torture Never Stops
- 10
Frank Zappa - Montana
- 11
Frank Zappa - Watermelon In Easter Hay
- 12
Frank Zappa - You Are What You Is
- 13
Frank Zappa - A Little Green Rosetta
- 14
Frank Zappa - Catholic Girls
- 15
Frank Zappa - Yo' Mama
- 16
Frank Zappa - Any Way The Wind Blows
- 17
Frank Zappa - Apostrophe(')
- 18
Frank Zappa - Dickie's Such An Asshole
- 19
Frank Zappa - Doreen
- 20
Frank Zappa - Heavenly Bank Account
- 21
Frank Zappa - Jewish Princess
- 22
Frank Zappa - Lucille Has Messed My Mind Up
- 23
Frank Zappa - Nanook Rubs It
- 24
Frank Zappa - Stink-Foot
- 25
Frank Zappa - Trouble Every Day
- 26
Frank Zappa - Willie The Pimp
- 27
Frank Zappa - Ain't Got No Heart
- 28
Frank Zappa - Black Napkins
- 29
Frank Zappa - Carolina Hard-Core Ecstasy
- 30
Frank Zappa - Cocaine Decisions
- 31
Frank Zappa - Dirty Love
- 32
Frank Zappa - Outside Now
- 33
Frank Zappa - Sam With The Showing Scalp Flat Top
- 34
Frank Zappa - San Ber'dino
- 35
Frank Zappa - Sexual Harassment In The Workplace
- 36
Frank Zappa - Stick It Out
- 37
Frank Zappa - 200 Years Old
- 38
Frank Zappa - Concentration Moon
- 39
Frank Zappa - Debra Kadabra
- 40
Frank Zappa - Disco Boy
- 41
Frank Zappa - Don't Eat The Yellow Snow
- 42
Frank Zappa - Fembot In A Wet T-shirt
- 43
Frank Zappa - He Used To Cut The Grass
- 44
Frank Zappa - Honey, Don't You Want A Man Like Me?
- 45
Frank Zappa - How Could I Be Such A Fool
- 46
Frank Zappa - Lemme Take You To The Beach
- 47
Frank Zappa - My Guitar Wants To Kill Your Mama
- 48
Frank Zappa - Valarie
- 49
Frank Zappa - Valley Girl
- 50
Frank Zappa - Village Of The Sun
- 51
Frank Zappa - Your Mouth
- 52
Frank Zappa - Advance Romance
- 53
Frank Zappa - Any Kind Of Pain
- 54
Frank Zappa - Baby Snakes
- 55
Frank Zappa - Bacon Fat
- 56
Frank Zappa - Beauty Knows No Pain
- 57
Frank Zappa - Broken Hearts Are For Assholes
- 58
Frank Zappa - Brown Shoes Don't Make It
- 59
Frank Zappa - Camarillo Brillo
- 60
Frank Zappa - Can't Afford No Shoes
- 61
Frank Zappa - Cletus Awreetus-Awrightus
- 62
Frank Zappa - Conehead
- 63
Frank Zappa - Crew Slut
- 64
Frank Zappa - Cucamonga
- 65
Frank Zappa - Dinah Moe Humm
- 66
Frank Zappa - Dumb All Over
- 67
Frank Zappa - Father O'Blivion
- 68
Frank Zappa - Fifty-Fifty
- 69
Frank Zappa - Florentine Pogen
- 70
Frank Zappa - For The Young Sophisticate
- 71
Frank Zappa - Goblin Girl
- 72
Frank Zappa - Harder Than Your Husband
- 73
Frank Zappa - He's So Gay
- 74
Frank Zappa - I Have Been In You
- 75
Frank Zappa - I'm Not Satisfied
- 76
Frank Zappa - I'm So Happy I Could Cry
- 77
Frank Zappa - I'm The Slime
- 78
Frank Zappa - Ian Underwood Whips It Out
- 79
Frank Zappa - Magdalena
- 80
Frank Zappa - Man With The Woman Head
- 81
Frank Zappa - Mom & Dad
- 82
Frank Zappa - Mudd Club
- 83
Frank Zappa - Packard Goose
- 84
Frank Zappa - Penguin In Bondage
- 85
Frank Zappa - Penis Dimension
- 86
Frank Zappa - Planet Of My Dreams
- 87
Frank Zappa - Po-Jama People
- 88
Frank Zappa - Poofter's Froth Wyoming Plans Ahead
- 89
Frank Zappa - Rat Tomago
- 90
Frank Zappa - Redneck Eats
- 91
Frank Zappa - Sleeping In A Jar
- 92
Frank Zappa - Sofa #2
- 93
Frank Zappa - Son Of Mr. Green Genes
- 94
Frank Zappa - St. Alfonzo's Pancake Breakfast
- 95
Frank Zappa - Suicide Chump
- 96
Frank Zappa - Sy Borg
- 97
Frank Zappa - Telephone Conversation
- 98
Frank Zappa - The Adventures Of Greggery Peccary
- 99
Frank Zappa - The Duke of Prunes
- 100
Frank Zappa - The Duke Regains His Chops
- 101
Frank Zappa - The Meek Shall Inherit Nothing
- 102
Frank Zappa - The Meek Shall Inherit Nothing (in album Thing-Fish)
- 103
Frank Zappa - Tinseltown Rebellion
- 104
Frank Zappa - Uncle Bernie's Farm
- 105
Frank Zappa - Very Distraughtening
- 106
Frank Zappa - We Are Not Alone
- 107
Frank Zappa - We Gotta Get Into Something Real
- 108
Frank Zappa - Wet T-Shirt Nite
- 109
Frank Zappa - What's The Ugliest part Of Your Body?
- 110
Frank Zappa - Whippin' Post
- 111
Frank Zappa - Who Are The Brain Police?
- 112
Frank Zappa - Who Needs The Peace Corps?
- 113
Frank Zappa - Wowie Zowie
- 114
Frank Zappa - Wplj
- 115
Frank Zappa - 200 Motels Fineale
- 116
Frank Zappa - 5050
- 117
Frank Zappa - 9/8 Objects
- 118
Frank Zappa - A Few Moments With Brother A. West
- 119
Frank Zappa - A Game Of Cards
- 120
Frank Zappa - A Nun Suit Painted On Some Old Boxes
- 121
Frank Zappa - A Token Of My Extreme
- 122
Frank Zappa - A Typical Sound Check
- 123
Frank Zappa - Absolutely Free
- 124
Frank Zappa - Advance Romance (in album You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore vol 3 )
- 125
Frank Zappa - Agency Man
- 126
Frank Zappa - Alley Cat
- 127
Frank Zappa - America Drinks
- 128
Frank Zappa - America Drinks & Goes Home
- 129
Frank Zappa - Amnesia Vivace
- 130
Frank Zappa - Andy
- 131
Frank Zappa - Any Downers?
- 132
Frank Zappa - Anything
- 133
Frank Zappa - Approximate
- 134
Frank Zappa - Are You Hung Up?
- 135
Frank Zappa - Are You Upset?
- 136
Frank Zappa - Artificial Rhonda
- 137
Frank Zappa - At The Gas Station
- 138
Frank Zappa - Babbette
- 139
Frank Zappa - Baby Please Don't Go (feat. John Lennon)
- 140
Frank Zappa - Baby, Take Your Teeth Out
- 141
Frank Zappa - Baked-Bean Boogie
- 142
Frank Zappa - Bamboozled By Love
- 143
Frank Zappa - Be In My Video
- 144
Frank Zappa - Be-Bop Tango (Of The Old Jazzmen's Church)
- 145
Frank Zappa - Big Leg Emma
- 146
Frank Zappa - Big Swifty
- 147
Frank Zappa - Billy The Mountain
- 148
Frank Zappa - Bow Tie Daddy
- 149
Frank Zappa - Briefcase Boogie
- 150
Frank Zappa - Brown Moses
- 151
Frank Zappa - Brown Shoes Don't Make It (in album Tinseltown Rebellion)
- 152
Frank Zappa - Bwana Dik
- 153
Frank Zappa - Call Any Vegetable
- 154
Frank Zappa - Call Any Vegetable (in album Just Another Band From L.A.)
- 155
Frank Zappa - Carol, You Fool
- 156
Frank Zappa - Carolina Hard-Core Ecstasy (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 4)
- 157
Frank Zappa - Centerville
- 158
Frank Zappa - Chana In De Bushwop
- 159
Frank Zappa - Charles Ives
- 160
Frank Zappa - Charlie's Enormous Mouth
- 161
Frank Zappa - Charva
- 162
Frank Zappa - Cheap Thrills
- 163
Frank Zappa - Cheepnis
- 164
Frank Zappa - Chocolate Halvah
- 165
Frank Zappa - Chunga's Revenge
- 166
Frank Zappa - Church Chat
- 167
Frank Zappa - City Of Tiny Lites
- 168
Frank Zappa - City Of Tiny Lites (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 5)
- 169
Frank Zappa - Clowns On Velvet
- 170
Frank Zappa - Cocaine Decisions (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 3)
- 171
Frank Zappa - Cock-Suckers' Ball
- 172
Frank Zappa - Cops & Buns
- 173
Frank Zappa - Cruising For Burgers
- 174
Frank Zappa - Daddy, Daddy, Daddy
- 175
Frank Zappa - Dance Contest
- 176
Frank Zappa - Dancin' Fool
- 177
Frank Zappa - Dental Hygeine Dilemma
- 178
Frank Zappa - Dental Hygiene Dilemma
- 179
Frank Zappa - Deseri
- 180
Frank Zappa - Dew On The Newts We Got
- 181
Frank Zappa - Didja Get Any Onya?
- 182
Frank Zappa - Directly From My Heart To You
- 183
Frank Zappa - Diseases Of The Band
- 184
Frank Zappa - Do You Like My New Car?
- 185
Frank Zappa - Does This Kind of Life Does This Kind of Life?
- 186
Frank Zappa - Does This Kind Of Life Look Interesting To You?
- 187
Frank Zappa - Dog Breath
- 188
Frank Zappa - Dog Breath, In The Year Of The Plague
- 189
Frank Zappa - Don't You Ever Wash That Thing?
- 190
Frank Zappa - Dong Work For Yuda
- 191
Frank Zappa - Doreen (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 5)
- 192
Frank Zappa - Drafted Again
- 193
Frank Zappa - Drop Dead
- 194
Frank Zappa - Drowning Witch
- 195
Frank Zappa - Drowning Witch (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 3)
- 196
Frank Zappa - Drums Are Too Noisy
- 197
Frank Zappa - Duke Of Prunes
- 198
Frank Zappa - Dummy Up
- 199
Frank Zappa - Easy Meat
- 200
Frank Zappa - Echidna's Arf (Of You)
- 201
Frank Zappa - Eddie, Are You Kidding?
- 202
Frank Zappa - Electric Aunt Jemima
- 203
Frank Zappa - Elvis Has Just Left The Building
- 204
Frank Zappa - Envelops The Bath Tub
- 205
Frank Zappa - Epilogue
- 206
Frank Zappa - Evelyn, A Modified Dog
- 207
Frank Zappa - Excentrifugal Forz
- 208
Frank Zappa - Find Her Finer
- 209
Frank Zappa - Fine Girl
- 210
Frank Zappa - Flakes
- 211
Frank Zappa - Flambay
- 212
Frank Zappa - Flower Punk
- 213
Frank Zappa - For Calvin (And His Next Two Hitch-Hikers)
- 214
Frank Zappa - Fountain Of Love
- 215
Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa
- 216
Frank Zappa - Frogs With Dirty Little Lips
- 217
Frank Zappa - Fuck Yourself
- 218
Frank Zappa - Galoot Up-Date
- 219
Frank Zappa - Geneva Farewell
- 220
Frank Zappa - German Lunch
- 221
Frank Zappa - Get A Little
- 222
Frank Zappa - Go Cry On Somebody Else's Shoulder
- 223
Frank Zappa - God Bless America
- 224
Frank Zappa - Half A Dozen Provocative Squats
- 225
Frank Zappa - Happy Together
- 226
Frank Zappa - Harry & Rhonda
- 227
Frank Zappa - Harry-As-A-Boy
- 228
Frank Zappa - Harry, You're A Beast
- 229
Frank Zappa - Help, I'm a Rock
- 230
Frank Zappa - Here Lies Love
- 231
Frank Zappa - Holding The Group Back
- 232
Frank Zappa - Holiday In Berlin
- 233
Frank Zappa - Hordern Intro (Incan Art Vamp)
- 234
Frank Zappa - Hot Plate Heaven At The Green Hotel
- 235
Frank Zappa - Hot Poop
- 236
Frank Zappa - How Could I Be Such A Fool?
- 237
Frank Zappa - Hungry Freaks, Daddy
- 238
Frank Zappa - I Ain't Got No Heart
- 239
Frank Zappa - I Ain't Got No Heart (in album Tinseltown Rebellion)
- 240
Frank Zappa - I Come From Nowhere
- 241
Frank Zappa - I Don't Even Care
- 242
Frank Zappa - I Don't Wanna Get Drafted
- 243
Frank Zappa - I Promise Not To Come In Your Mouth
- 244
Frank Zappa - I'm A Band Leader
- 245
Frank Zappa - I'm A Beautiful Guy
- 246
Frank Zappa - I'm So Cute
- 247
Frank Zappa - I'm Stealing The Towels
- 248
Frank Zappa - If Only She Woulda
- 249
Frank Zappa - If We'd All Been Living In California...
- 250
Frank Zappa - In France
- 251
Frank Zappa - Intro (The Yellow Shark Album)
- 252
Frank Zappa - Invocation And Ritual Dance Of The Young Pumpkin
- 253
Frank Zappa - It Can't Happen Here
- 254
Frank Zappa - It Just Might Be A One-Shot Deal
- 255
Frank Zappa - Janet's Big Dance Number
- 256
Frank Zappa - JCB & Kansas On The Bus #1
- 257
Frank Zappa - JCB & Kansas On The Bus #2
- 258
Frank Zappa - Jelly Roll Gum Drop
- 259
Frank Zappa - Jesus Thinks You're A Jerk
- 260
Frank Zappa - Jezebel Boy
- 261
Frank Zappa - Johnny Darling
- 262
Frank Zappa - Jones Crusher
- 263
Frank Zappa - Jumbo Go Away
- 264
Frank Zappa - Just One More Time
- 265
Frank Zappa - Kaiser Rolls
- 266
Frank Zappa - Kangaroos
- 267
Frank Zappa - Keep It Greasey
- 268
Frank Zappa - Keep It Greasy
- 269
Frank Zappa - Kenny's Booger Story
- 270
Frank Zappa - King Kong
- 271
Frank Zappa - Later That Night
- 272
Frank Zappa - Latex Solar Beef
- 273
Frank Zappa - Let's Make The Water Turn Black
- 274
Frank Zappa - Let's Move To Cleveland
- 275
Frank Zappa - Library Card
- 276
Frank Zappa - Like It Or Not
- 277
Frank Zappa - Little Girl Of Mine
- 278
Frank Zappa - Little Green Scratchy Sweaters & Courturoy Ponce
- 279
Frank Zappa - Little House I Used To Live In
- 280
Frank Zappa - Little House I Used To Live In (in album Fillmore East )
- 281
Frank Zappa - Little Rubber Girl
- 282
Frank Zappa - Little Umbrellas
- 283
Frank Zappa - Lonely Little Girl
- 284
Frank Zappa - Lonesome Cowboy Burt
- 285
Frank Zappa - Lonesome Cowboy Nando
- 286
Frank Zappa - Lonesome Electric Turkey
- 287
Frank Zappa - Lost In A Whirlpool
- 288
Frank Zappa - Louie Louie
- 289
Frank Zappa - Love Of My Life
- 290
Frank Zappa - Love Story
- 291
Frank Zappa - Lucille Has Messed My Mind Up (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 3)
- 292
Frank Zappa - Lumpy Gravy I
- 293
Frank Zappa - Magic Fingers
- 294
Frank Zappa - Mary Lou
- 295
Frank Zappa - Massagio Galore
- 296
Frank Zappa - Master Ringo
- 297
Frank Zappa - Meow
- 298
Frank Zappa - Moggio
- 299
Frank Zappa - Montana (Whipping Floss)
- 300
Frank Zappa - More Trouble Every Day
Dental Hygeine Dilemma
Frank Zappa
Howard Kaylan (vocals)
Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds)
Aynsley Dunbar (drums)
George Duke (keyboards, trombone)
Martin Lickert (bass)
Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set)
Jim Pons (vocals)
Bad Concience:
han min noon toon han toon han
Good Concience:
No, Jeff!
Bad Concience:
han toon ran toon ran toon fran min han toon ran toon nan toon fram
Good Concience:
No no no!
Jeff Simmons:
Man! This stuff is great! It's just as if Donovan himself had appeared on my very own TV with words of peace, love, and eternal cosmic wisdom. Leading me. Guiding me. On paths of everlasting pseudo-karmic negligence, in the very midst of my drug-induced nocturnal emission.
Good Concience:
Oh, I am your good conscience, Jeff. I know all. I see all. I am a cosmic love pulse matrix, becoming a technicolor interpositive.
Jeff Simmons:
Hmm? Where'd you buy that incense? It's hip.
Good Concience:
It's the same mysterious exotic oriental fragrance as what the Beatles get off on.
Jeff Simmons:
I thought I recognized it. Mmm, what is that, musk?
Good Concience:
Jeff, I know what's good for you.
Jeff Simmons:
Right. You're heavy.
Good Concience:
Yes Jeff, I am your guiding light. Listen to me. Don't rip off the towels Jeff!
Bad Concience:
Kiss off, you little nitwit.
Jeff Simmons:
Hey man, what's the deal?
Good Concience:
Don't listen to him Jeff, he's no good. He'll make you do bad things!
Jeff Simmons:
You mean, he'll make me sin?
Good Concience:
Yes, Jeff. SIN!
Jeff Simmons:
Wow!
Bad Concience:
Jeff, I'd like to have a word with you. About your soul.
Good Concience:
No, don't listen Jeff.
Bad Concience:
Why are you wasting your life, night after night playing this comedy music?
Jeff Simmons:
You're right, I'm too heavy to be in this group.
Good Concience:
Comedy music.
Bad Concience:
Jeff, your soul!
Jeff Simmons:
In this group, all I ever get to do is play Zappa's comedy music. He eats!
Bad Concience:
Jeff!
Jeff Simmons:
I get so tense.
Bad Concience:
Of course you do my boy.
Jeff Simmons:
The stuff he makes me do is always off the wall.
Bad Concience:
That's why it would be best to leave his stern employ.
Jeff Simmons:
And quit the group!
Bad Concience:
You'll make it big!
Jeff Simmons:
That's right.
Bad Concience:
Of course!
Jeff Simmons:
And then I won't be small!
Ahmet Ertegun used this towel as a bathmat six weeks ago at a rancid motel in Orlando, Florida, with the highest mildew rating of any commercial lodging facility within the territorial limits of the United States, naturally excluding tropical possessions. It's still damp. What an aroma! This is the best I ever got off! What can I say about this elixir? Try it on steaks! Cleans nylons! Small craft warnings! It's made for the home! The office! On fruits!
Bad Concience:
This is the real you, Jeff. Rip off a few more ashtrays. Get rid of some of that inner tension. Quit the comedy group! Get your own group together. Heavy! Like Grand Funk, or Black Sabbath.
Good Concience:
No, Jeff. ??:
[?We're coming]
Good Concience:
Peace. Love.
Bad Concience:
Bollocks.
Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan:
What can I say about this elixir?
Mark Volman:
Jeff has gone out there on that stuff!
Bad Concience:
He should have never have used the elixir and only stuck to the incense. Oh, Atlantis.
Mark Volman:
That was Billy the Mountain, dressed up like Donovan, fading out on the wall-mounted TV screen. Jeff _is_ flipping out. Road fatigue! We've got to get him back to normal before Zappa finds out, and steals it, and makes him do it in the movie.
Bad Concience:
You have a brilliant career ahead of you my boy. Just get out of this group!
Mark Volman:
Howard, that was Studebacher Hoch, dressed up like Jim Pons, giving career guidance to the bass player of a rock-oriented comedy group. Jeff's imagination has gone beyond the fringe of audience comprehension.
Howard Kaylan:
Jeff, Jeff it's me the Phlorescent Leech!
Mark Volman:
Jeff, Jeff it's me, Eddie!
Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan:
Wowwww! What can I say about this elixir?
{note: the following three paragraphs are simultaneous and with wildly} {fluctuating pitch. A turntable with a detachable drive is still a useful} {tool! -cgk}
Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan:
Put it on your steaks, uh, send it overseas, [? ? ? ?], and put it on you surfboard so you won't slip off. Try it on your [? ? ?], and on the, the red balloons, you can blow up all balloons with it. Put it on your... heh. On your pizza. Put it on your shoes, tie your mic with it, and fill up your tires with it.
Use it to clean your swimming pool, sell it to your mother and tell her it's a tie-die kit, you won't even believe what'll happen when you starch your shirt with it, ironing goes easier and your car windows never looked better in your whole life. Ladies and gentlemen, you can inhale it, and it makes your voice three keys higher, and you can't even stand what happens when you put it on your hair, as hair tonic. Heh, heh. And if you ever tried it as a...
Soak your shirts in it, soak your teeth in it. Let it play the piano. Follow it around the block. Wear it instead of jeans. Bathe you puppies with it. Feed it to your ducks. Use it instead of chlorine in your swimming pool. Breathe it. [?] it.
What?
Wowwwwww!
What can I?
Wowwwwww!
What? What can I say about this?
Wowwwwww!