- 1
Frank Zappa - Uncle Remus
- 2
Frank Zappa - Bobby Brown Goes Down
- 3
Frank Zappa - Muffin Man
- 4
Frank Zappa - Bobby Brown
- 5
Frank Zappa - Apostrophe(')
- 6
Frank Zappa - Cosmik Debris
- 7
Frank Zappa - Watermelon In Easter Hay
- 8
Frank Zappa - Don't Eat The Yellow Snow
- 9
Frank Zappa - Peaches En Regalia
- 10
Frank Zappa - Montana
- 11
Frank Zappa - Joe's Garage
- 12
Frank Zappa - Willie The Pimp
- 13
Frank Zappa - Broken Hearts Are For Assholes
- 14
Frank Zappa - Nanook Rubs It
- 15
Frank Zappa - Catholic Girls
- 16
Frank Zappa - Cocaine Decisions
- 17
Frank Zappa - Flakes
- 18
Frank Zappa - I'm The Slime
- 19
Frank Zappa - Dirty Love
- 20
Frank Zappa - Stick It Out
- 21
Frank Zappa - The Torture Never Stops
- 22
Frank Zappa - Valarie
- 23
Frank Zappa - You Are What You Is
- 24
Frank Zappa - Dinah Moe Humm
- 25
Frank Zappa - Packard Goose
- 26
Frank Zappa - Plastic People
- 27
Frank Zappa - Billy The Mountain
- 28
Frank Zappa - Camarillo Brillo
- 29
Frank Zappa - Charlie's Enormous Mouth
- 30
Frank Zappa - Fembot In A Wet T-shirt
- 31
Frank Zappa - St. Alfonzo's Pancake Breakfast
- 32
Frank Zappa - The Illinois Enema Bandit
- 33
Frank Zappa - We Are Not Alone
- 34
Frank Zappa - Why Does It Hurt When I Pee?
- 35
Frank Zappa - Yo' Mama
- 36
Frank Zappa - Chunga's Revenge
- 37
Frank Zappa - Cock-Suckers' Ball
- 38
Frank Zappa - Dancin' Fool
- 39
Frank Zappa - Dumb All Over
- 40
Frank Zappa - Go Cry On Somebody Else's Shoulder
- 41
Frank Zappa - He's So Gay
- 42
Frank Zappa - Heavenly Bank Account
- 43
Frank Zappa - I'm So Cute
- 44
Frank Zappa - Jewish Princess
- 45
Frank Zappa - Lucille Has Messed My Mind Up
- 46
Frank Zappa - My Guitar Wants To Kill Your Mama
- 47
Frank Zappa - Stevie's Spanking
- 48
Frank Zappa - The Adventures Of Greggery Peccary
- 49
Frank Zappa - The Closer You Are
- 50
Frank Zappa - The Radio Is Broken
- 51
Frank Zappa - Titties & Beer
- 52
Frank Zappa - Tryin' To Grow A Chin
- 53
Frank Zappa - Zoot Allures
- 54
Frank Zappa - A Game Of Cards
- 55
Frank Zappa - A Little Green Rosetta
- 56
Frank Zappa - A Token Of My Extreme
- 57
Frank Zappa - A Typical Sound Check
- 58
Frank Zappa - Absolutely Free
- 59
Frank Zappa - Any Downers?
- 60
Frank Zappa - Are You Hung Up?
- 61
Frank Zappa - Babbette
- 62
Frank Zappa - Baby Please Don't Go (feat. John Lennon)
- 63
Frank Zappa - Baby Snakes
- 64
Frank Zappa - Be In My Video
- 65
Frank Zappa - Black Napkins
- 66
Frank Zappa - Brown Moses
- 67
Frank Zappa - Can't Afford No Shoes
- 68
Frank Zappa - Carolina Hard-Core Ecstasy
- 69
Frank Zappa - City Of Tiny Lites
- 70
Frank Zappa - Crew Slut
- 71
Frank Zappa - Disco Boy
- 72
Frank Zappa - Does This Kind Of Life Look Interesting To You?
- 73
Frank Zappa - Evelyn, A Modified Dog
- 74
Frank Zappa - Fifty-Fifty
- 75
Frank Zappa - Find Her Finer
- 76
Frank Zappa - Florentine Pogen
- 77
Frank Zappa - Fuck Yourself
- 78
Frank Zappa - Harder Than Your Husband
- 79
Frank Zappa - Harry & Rhonda
- 80
Frank Zappa - Harry, You're A Beast
- 81
Frank Zappa - Here Lies Love
- 82
Frank Zappa - I'm Not Satisfied
- 83
Frank Zappa - If Only She Woulda
- 84
Frank Zappa - Inca Roads
- 85
Frank Zappa - Jesus Thinks You're A Jerk
- 86
Frank Zappa - King Kong
- 87
Frank Zappa - Little Umbrellas
- 88
Frank Zappa - Magic Fingers
- 89
Frank Zappa - Meow
- 90
Frank Zappa - Mother People
- 91
Frank Zappa - Motherly Love
- 92
Frank Zappa - Ms. Pinky
- 93
Frank Zappa - Oh No
- 94
Frank Zappa - Pick Me, I'm Clean
- 95
Frank Zappa - Po-Jama People
- 96
Frank Zappa - Punky's Whips
- 97
Frank Zappa - Rat Tomago
- 98
Frank Zappa - Sleeping In A Jar
- 99
Frank Zappa - Society Pages
- 100
Frank Zappa - Stink-Foot
- 101
Frank Zappa - Tell Me You Love Me
- 102
Frank Zappa - The Duke of Prunes
- 103
Frank Zappa - The Mammy Nuns
- 104
Frank Zappa - The Man From Utopia Meets Mary Lou
- 105
Frank Zappa - Trouble Every Day
- 106
Frank Zappa - Village Of The Sun
- 107
Frank Zappa - Welcome To The United States
- 108
Frank Zappa - Why Don'tcha Do Me Right?
- 109
Frank Zappa - Wind Up Workin' In The Gas Station
- 110
Frank Zappa - Yo Cats
- 111
Frank Zappa - 200 Motels Fineale
- 112
Frank Zappa - 200 Years Old
- 113
Frank Zappa - 5050
- 114
Frank Zappa - 9/8 Objects
- 115
Frank Zappa - A Few Moments With Brother A. West
- 116
Frank Zappa - A Nun Suit Painted On Some Old Boxes
- 117
Frank Zappa - Advance Romance
- 118
Frank Zappa - Advance Romance (in album You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore vol 3 )
- 119
Frank Zappa - Agency Man
- 120
Frank Zappa - Ain't Got No Heart
- 121
Frank Zappa - Alley Cat
- 122
Frank Zappa - America Drinks
- 123
Frank Zappa - America Drinks & Goes Home
- 124
Frank Zappa - Amnesia Vivace
- 125
Frank Zappa - Andy
- 126
Frank Zappa - Any Kind Of Pain
- 127
Frank Zappa - Any Way The Wind Blows
- 128
Frank Zappa - Anything
- 129
Frank Zappa - Approximate
- 130
Frank Zappa - Are You Upset?
- 131
Frank Zappa - Artificial Rhonda
- 132
Frank Zappa - At The Gas Station
- 133
Frank Zappa - Baby, Take Your Teeth Out
- 134
Frank Zappa - Bacon Fat
- 135
Frank Zappa - Baked-Bean Boogie
- 136
Frank Zappa - Bamboozled By Love
- 137
Frank Zappa - Be-Bop Tango (Of The Old Jazzmen's Church)
- 138
Frank Zappa - Beauty Knows No Pain
- 139
Frank Zappa - Big Leg Emma
- 140
Frank Zappa - Big Swifty
- 141
Frank Zappa - Bow Tie Daddy
- 142
Frank Zappa - Briefcase Boogie
- 143
Frank Zappa - Brown Shoes Don't Make It
- 144
Frank Zappa - Brown Shoes Don't Make It (in album Tinseltown Rebellion)
- 145
Frank Zappa - Bwana Dik
- 146
Frank Zappa - Call Any Vegetable
- 147
Frank Zappa - Call Any Vegetable (in album Just Another Band From L.A.)
- 148
Frank Zappa - Carol, You Fool
- 149
Frank Zappa - Carolina Hard-Core Ecstasy (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 4)
- 150
Frank Zappa - Centerville
- 151
Frank Zappa - Chana In De Bushwop
- 152
Frank Zappa - Charles Ives
- 153
Frank Zappa - Charva
- 154
Frank Zappa - Cheap Thrills
- 155
Frank Zappa - Cheepnis
- 156
Frank Zappa - Chocolate Halvah
- 157
Frank Zappa - Church Chat
- 158
Frank Zappa - City Of Tiny Lites (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 5)
- 159
Frank Zappa - Cletus Awreetus-Awrightus
- 160
Frank Zappa - Clowns On Velvet
- 161
Frank Zappa - Cocaine Decisions (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 3)
- 162
Frank Zappa - Concentration Moon
- 163
Frank Zappa - Conehead
- 164
Frank Zappa - Cops & Buns
- 165
Frank Zappa - Cruising For Burgers
- 166
Frank Zappa - Cucamonga
- 167
Frank Zappa - Daddy, Daddy, Daddy
- 168
Frank Zappa - Dance Contest
- 169
Frank Zappa - Debra Kadabra
- 170
Frank Zappa - Dental Hygeine Dilemma
- 171
Frank Zappa - Dental Hygiene Dilemma
- 172
Frank Zappa - Deseri
- 173
Frank Zappa - Dew On The Newts We Got
- 174
Frank Zappa - Dickie's Such An Asshole
- 175
Frank Zappa - Didja Get Any Onya?
- 176
Frank Zappa - Directly From My Heart To You
- 177
Frank Zappa - Diseases Of The Band
- 178
Frank Zappa - Do You Like My New Car?
- 179
Frank Zappa - Does This Kind of Life Does This Kind of Life?
- 180
Frank Zappa - Dog Breath
- 181
Frank Zappa - Dog Breath, In The Year Of The Plague
- 182
Frank Zappa - Don't You Ever Wash That Thing?
- 183
Frank Zappa - Dong Work For Yuda
- 184
Frank Zappa - Doreen
- 185
Frank Zappa - Doreen (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 5)
- 186
Frank Zappa - Drafted Again
- 187
Frank Zappa - Drop Dead
- 188
Frank Zappa - Drowning Witch
- 189
Frank Zappa - Drowning Witch (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 3)
- 190
Frank Zappa - Drums Are Too Noisy
- 191
Frank Zappa - Duke Of Prunes
- 192
Frank Zappa - Dummy Up
- 193
Frank Zappa - Easy Meat
- 194
Frank Zappa - Echidna's Arf (Of You)
- 195
Frank Zappa - Eddie, Are You Kidding?
- 196
Frank Zappa - Electric Aunt Jemima
- 197
Frank Zappa - Elvis Has Just Left The Building
- 198
Frank Zappa - Envelops The Bath Tub
- 199
Frank Zappa - Epilogue
- 200
Frank Zappa - Excentrifugal Forz
- 201
Frank Zappa - Father O'Blivion
- 202
Frank Zappa - Fine Girl
- 203
Frank Zappa - Flambay
- 204
Frank Zappa - Flower Punk
- 205
Frank Zappa - For Calvin (And His Next Two Hitch-Hikers)
- 206
Frank Zappa - For The Young Sophisticate
- 207
Frank Zappa - Fountain Of Love
- 208
Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa
- 209
Frank Zappa - Frogs With Dirty Little Lips
- 210
Frank Zappa - Galoot Up-Date
- 211
Frank Zappa - Geneva Farewell
- 212
Frank Zappa - German Lunch
- 213
Frank Zappa - Get A Little
- 214
Frank Zappa - Goblin Girl
- 215
Frank Zappa - God Bless America
- 216
Frank Zappa - Half A Dozen Provocative Squats
- 217
Frank Zappa - Happy Together
- 218
Frank Zappa - Harry-As-A-Boy
- 219
Frank Zappa - He Used To Cut The Grass
- 220
Frank Zappa - Help, I'm a Rock
- 221
Frank Zappa - Holding The Group Back
- 222
Frank Zappa - Holiday In Berlin
- 223
Frank Zappa - Honey, Don't You Want A Man Like Me?
- 224
Frank Zappa - Hordern Intro (Incan Art Vamp)
- 225
Frank Zappa - Hot Plate Heaven At The Green Hotel
- 226
Frank Zappa - Hot Poop
- 227
Frank Zappa - How Could I Be Such A Fool
- 228
Frank Zappa - How Could I Be Such A Fool?
- 229
Frank Zappa - Hungry Freaks, Daddy
- 230
Frank Zappa - I Ain't Got No Heart
- 231
Frank Zappa - I Ain't Got No Heart (in album Tinseltown Rebellion)
- 232
Frank Zappa - I Come From Nowhere
- 233
Frank Zappa - I Don't Even Care
- 234
Frank Zappa - I Don't Wanna Get Drafted
- 235
Frank Zappa - I Have Been In You
- 236
Frank Zappa - I Promise Not To Come In Your Mouth
- 237
Frank Zappa - I'm A Band Leader
- 238
Frank Zappa - I'm A Beautiful Guy
- 239
Frank Zappa - I'm So Happy I Could Cry
- 240
Frank Zappa - I'm Stealing The Towels
- 241
Frank Zappa - Ian Underwood Whips It Out
- 242
Frank Zappa - If We'd All Been Living In California...
- 243
Frank Zappa - In France
- 244
Frank Zappa - Intro (The Yellow Shark Album)
- 245
Frank Zappa - Invocation And Ritual Dance Of The Young Pumpkin
- 246
Frank Zappa - It Can't Happen Here
- 247
Frank Zappa - It Just Might Be A One-Shot Deal
- 248
Frank Zappa - Janet's Big Dance Number
- 249
Frank Zappa - JCB & Kansas On The Bus #1
- 250
Frank Zappa - JCB & Kansas On The Bus #2
- 251
Frank Zappa - Jelly Roll Gum Drop
- 252
Frank Zappa - Jezebel Boy
- 253
Frank Zappa - Johnny Darling
- 254
Frank Zappa - Jones Crusher
- 255
Frank Zappa - Jumbo Go Away
- 256
Frank Zappa - Just One More Time
- 257
Frank Zappa - Kaiser Rolls
- 258
Frank Zappa - Kangaroos
- 259
Frank Zappa - Keep It Greasey
- 260
Frank Zappa - Keep It Greasy
- 261
Frank Zappa - Kenny's Booger Story
- 262
Frank Zappa - Later That Night
- 263
Frank Zappa - Latex Solar Beef
- 264
Frank Zappa - Lemme Take You To The Beach
- 265
Frank Zappa - Let's Make The Water Turn Black
- 266
Frank Zappa - Let's Move To Cleveland
- 267
Frank Zappa - Library Card
- 268
Frank Zappa - Like It Or Not
- 269
Frank Zappa - Little Girl Of Mine
- 270
Frank Zappa - Little Green Scratchy Sweaters & Courturoy Ponce
- 271
Frank Zappa - Little House I Used To Live In
- 272
Frank Zappa - Little House I Used To Live In (in album Fillmore East )
- 273
Frank Zappa - Little Rubber Girl
- 274
Frank Zappa - Lonely Little Girl
- 275
Frank Zappa - Lonesome Cowboy Burt
- 276
Frank Zappa - Lonesome Cowboy Nando
- 277
Frank Zappa - Lonesome Electric Turkey
- 278
Frank Zappa - Lost In A Whirlpool
- 279
Frank Zappa - Louie Louie
- 280
Frank Zappa - Love Of My Life
- 281
Frank Zappa - Love Story
- 282
Frank Zappa - Lucille Has Messed My Mind Up (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 3)
- 283
Frank Zappa - Lumpy Gravy I
- 284
Frank Zappa - Magdalena
- 285
Frank Zappa - Man With The Woman Head
- 286
Frank Zappa - Mary Lou
- 287
Frank Zappa - Massagio Galore
- 288
Frank Zappa - Master Ringo
- 289
Frank Zappa - Moggio
- 290
Frank Zappa - Mom & Dad
- 291
Frank Zappa - Montana (Whipping Floss)
- 292
Frank Zappa - More Trouble Every Day
- 293
Frank Zappa - Mount St. Mary's Concert Excerpt
- 294
Frank Zappa - Mozart Ballet - Piano Sonata in B flat
- 295
Frank Zappa - Mr. Green Genes
- 296
Frank Zappa - Mudd Club
- 297
Frank Zappa - Mudd Club (in album Thing-Fish)
- 298
Frank Zappa - Murder By Numbers
- 299
Frank Zappa - My Guitar Wants To Kill Your Mama (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 4)
- 300
Frank Zappa - My Head?
Billy The Mountain
Frank Zappa
Billy the mountain
A regular picturesque
Postcardy mountain
Residing between lovely
Rosamond and gorman
With his stunning wife ethel
A tree, a tree.
Billy was a mountain
Ethel was a tree growing off of his shoulder
Billy was a mountain
Billy was a mountain
Ethel was a tree growing off of his shoulder
Ethel was a tree growing off of his shoulder
( hey, hey, hey! )
Billy had two big
Caves for eyes
With a cliff for a jaw
That would go up or down
And whenever it did
He'd puff out some dust
And hack up a boulder, hack.
Hack up a boulder, hack, hack.
Hack up a boulder, hack, hack.
Hack up a boulder.
Now, one day, and i believe it was on tuesday, a man in checkered double-knit suit drove up in large el dorado cadillac leased from bob spreene ( "where the freeways meet in downey!" ) and he laid a huge bulging envelope right at the corner of billy the mountain, that was right where his foot was supposed to be. now billy the mountain, he couldn't believe it: all those postcards he'd posed for, for all of those years, and finally, now at last, his royalties! "royalties, royalties, royalties! the royalty check is in, honey!" ... yes, billy the mountain was rich! yes, and his eyeball caves, they widened in amazement... and his jaw, which was a cliff, well it ... it dropped thirty feet! a bunch of dust puffed out ... rocks and boulders hacked up, hack! hack! ... crushing the lincoln ...
I gave him the money
He acted real funny
He hacked up a rock and
It totaled my car
Oh do you
Know any trucks
Might be bound for the valley
I don't wanna stand here
All night in this bar
( dear lord )
I don't wanna stand here
All night in this bar
( no shit )
I don't wanna stand here
All night in this bar
By two o'clock, when bars had already closed down, billy had broken the big news to ethel, ahhhh, and with dust and boulders everywhere, billy, choked with exitement, announced: "ethel, we're going on a vacation!"... yes, and they were going on a vacation, oh, and ethel, ethel, ethel, like any little woman, she of course was very excited ... she creaked a little bit, and some old birds flew off of her. billy told ethel they were going to... yes, they where going to new york! "ethel, we're going to... new york! but first they were gonna stop in las vegas...
"it's off to las vegas to check out the lounges,
Pull a few handles and drink a few beers, oh ethel,
Ethel, my darling, you know that i love you,
I'm glad we could have a vacation this year,
Oh neat-o, glad we could have a vacation this year."
They left that night, crunchin' across the mojave desert, their voices echoing thru the canyons of your minds... "ethel, wanna get a cuppa cawfee? howard johnson's, ahhh there's a howard johnson's! ... wanna eat some clams? ...
The first noteworhty piece of real estate they destroyed was edwards air force base. and to this very day, wing-nuts and data reduction clerks alike speak in reverent whispers about that fateful night when test stand number one and the rocket sled itself got lunched, i said lunched, by a famous mountain and his small wooden wife ...
"word just in to the kttv news service undeniably links this mountain and his wife to drug abuse and payoffs as part of san joaquin valley smut ring. however, we can assure parents in the southern california area that a recent narcotic crackdown in torrence ... hawthorne ... lomita ... westchester ... playa del rey ... santa monica ... tujunga ... sunland ... san fernando ... pacoima ... sylmar ... newhall ... canoga park ... palmdale ... glendale ... irwindale ... rolling hills ... granada hills ... shadow hills ... cheviot hills ... will provide the secret evidence the palmdale grand jury has needed to seek a criminal indictement and pave the way for stiffer legislation, increased federal aid, and avert a crippling strike of bartenders and veterinarians throughout the inland empire ..."
Within the week, jerry lewis had hosted a telethon ( la la la nice lady ) to raise funds for the injured, "injured", and homeless, "homeless" in glendale, as billy had just levelled it. and a few miles right outside of town billy caused a 'oh mine/my(?) papa' in the earth's crust, right over the secret underground dumps, right near the jack in the box on glenoaks where they keep the pools of old poison gas and obsolete germs bombs, just as a freak tornado cruised through ... yes, it was about three o'clock in the afternoon when little howard kaplan was sitting on his porch ( "toto...!") just playing ( "come here, toto ...!") and having a nice time with his little accordion, ("toto...!") and this weird wind came up, direct from glendale, blowing those terrible germs in his direction ... and all this caused by huge mountain ("aunty em") somewhere over the rainbow, blue birds fly, sucking up two-thirds of it ( suck, suck, suck) for an ultimetly dispersal over vast stretches of ... watts!!!
Now, unless i misunderstood, it was right outside of columbus, ohio when billy received his notice to report for his induction physical. now lemme tell ya, ethel said, now ethel, ethel said she wasn't gonna let him go ... "i'm not gonna let you go, billy" ... that's right, we now have confirmed reports from an informed orange county minister that ethel is still an active communist and it is this reporter's opinion that she also practices covent witch-craft ...
It was about this time that the telephone rang inside of the secret briefcase belonging to one mortal man who might be able to stop all of this senseless destruction and save america herself. and i'm sorry to disappoint some of you, it was not chief redden. this one man was studebacher hoch, fantastic new super hero of the current economic slump. now, some folks say he looked like zubin mehta (zubin mehta); still others say "bullshit, honey, it was just another greasy guy who happened to be born next to the frozen beef pies at boney's market..."; still others say "pshaw/shaun(?), and piss on you, jack, he's just a crazy iatlian who drove a red car ..." you see, nobody ever really knew for sure because studebacher was sooooo mysterious ....
He was so ( he was so, he was so) mysterious
He was so ( he was so, he was so) mysterious
'cuz when a person gets to be such a hero, folks
And marvelouse beyond compute
You can never really tell about a guy like that
Whether he's really a nice person
Or if he just smiles a lot
Or if he has a son named pinocchio or what.
Whether he's really a nice person
Or if he has a son named pinocchio or what.
Some men say he could fly
Some men say he could swim
Others say he could sing like neil sedaka,
And all the girls in flushing would be amazed of him
Two, three amazed of him ... amazed ...
Time passed. january, february, march, july, wednesdey, august, irwindale, two-thirty in the afternoon, sunday, monday, funny cars, walnuts, city of industry, big john masamanian ... so when the phone ring in the secret briefcase, a strong masculine hand with a dudley do-right wristwatch and flexy braclet grabbed it and answered in a deep, calmly assured voice: "so... ah... yeah, yeah hello already ... what? ... well, yeah? ... ah-are you kidding? ... you're not kidding ... a mountain ... with a tree growing off of its shoulder? aw, you're fulla shit, man... ah listen, by the way, before you go on; did you get those white albums i sent ya with the pencil on the front, yeah? yeah, you should move some of those for me ... we're having a lot of,...listen, so kiss little jakee on the head... and how's your wife's hemorrhoids?...ah, that's too bad...listen...so you've got a mountain, with a tree, listen, causing...well, let me write this down... sorta take a few notes here...yeah? ...to el segundo, huh?...causing
Untold destruction..( my baby, my baby )...wanted for draft evasion?... an expense account? ... and per diem, too?..."
Some men say he could dance
They said he could dance
And of course they were right ...
Ladies and gentelmen, this is it: the studebacher hoch dancing lesson & cosmic prayer for guidence, featuring aynsley dunbar! ... hit it! ...
Twirly, twirly, twirly, twirly, twirly, fillmore ...
Hey, right hand from a heart
Left hand from a heart
Right hand from a heart
Left hand from a left shoulder
To the heart. fillmore, fillmore ...
Nobody can dance like studebacher hoch ...
So many rumors have spread about studebacher hoch ... consider this rumor which was published about three weeks ago in rolling stone ( oh, it's gotta be true! ) ... studebacher hoch can write the lord's prayer on the head of a pin!" (no!) do-do-do do-do-doot doot do-do-do ... ... i'm so hip ... beef pies ... he was born next to the beef pies, underneath joni mitchell's autographed picture, right beside elliot robert's big bank book, next to the boat where crosby flushed away all his stash and the cops got him in the boat and drove away, to the can where neil young slipped another disc ...
[ frozen ??? pie
Frozen ??? pie
Frozen ??? pie
And that was the main influence on him
The influence of a frozen beef pie ]
Boldly springing into action he phoned his wife who ran a modeling school, whereupon he... yes, he ran around the back of the broadway at hollywood boulevard and vine to see if he could find himself some big, large, unused cardboard boxes ( no shit! )... after which he hit up the ralph's on sunset for some aunt jemima syrup, some kaiser boiler foil and pair of blunt sissors, yeah! ... yes, and in the parking lot of ralph's ... where no prices are lower prices than ralph's... in the parking lot of ralph's, in between a pair of customized trucks where nobody was looking, he cut out some really, really, really nice wings and he covered them thoroughly with foil ...
Then he took those wings and wedged one under each of his powerful arms and sneaked into a telephone booth ..yes,yes!! and then he shut the fucking door! ... and he pulled down his blue denim policeman-type trouser pants, and he spread even amounts of aunt jemima maple syrup all over the inside of his legs! ... soon the booth was filling with flies ( help me! help me! help me! ) ... he held open the legs of his boxer shorts so they could all get in, and when each and every one of those little cocksucking flies had gone into his pants and they were lapping up all that maple syrup, he bent over and he put his head between his legs and he said in a very clear, impressive, ron-hubbard-type voice: "new york"... and the booth and everything lifted up, out of parking lot, and into the sky.
Studebacher hoch
Yeah, yeah,
Studebacher hoch
Studebacher hoch
Studebacher hoch
Yeah, yeah,
Studebacher hoch
Studebacher hoch
He's coating his legs
With aunt jemima syrup up and down
His shorts will be filled with flies
That will be buzzing all around
Studebacher hoch is really outa sight
Studebacher hoch, he does it every night
Studebacher hoch, he treats the flies all right
Studebacher hoch
That's why they never bite, hey!
Hey please to new york
Fly to new york
He could be a dog
Or a frog
Or a lesbian queen
(fly to new york)
He could be a narc
Or a lady marine
Or he might play dirty
He's over thirty
Getting old ...
I don't know
His peculiar attire
And the flies he requires
Keep leading him on
'cuz ethel is gone
They keep leading him on
'cuz ethel is gone
And the mountain she's on
And speaking of mountains - - we'll join studebacher hoch on the edge of billy the mountain's mouth .. take it away! ...
"ah ... ya, ya, ya, hey-ah, billy, listen ... i've come to reason with you ... our great country needs you in the armed forces ... your number came up ... ya can't go on running like this forever ..."
Ah, but ethel just shook her twigs angrily. but studebacher hoch, calm, cool, collected and unperturbed, continued:
"ya, well listen ... listen you communist sonofabitch ... you better get your ass down there for your fuckin' physical or i'll see to it that you get used for fill dirt in some impending new jersey marsh reclamation ... and your girlfiend there will wind up disguised as series of brooms, primative ironing boards or a dog house ... get the ( cough, cough) get the picture?"
Ya, well billy just laughed:
"ha, ha, ha. if they think they're gonna draft me, they're crazy."
Unfortunately, because studebacher hoch was standing on the edge of billy the mountain's mouth when the giant mountain laughed ... studebacher hoch lost his footing and fell screaming, two hundred feet into the rubble below ... ( "aaahhhhh, oh fuck, i'm gonna need a truss ...")
Ah listen, that only goes to show you
And it'l show you once again that
A mountain is something you don't wanna fuck with
You don't wanna fuck with
Don't fuck around
Don't fuck around
Don't fuck with billy, no
And don't fuck with ethel
You saw what just happened
To the guy with the flies
Don't fuck around
Don't fuck around
Don't fuck around
Don't fuck around
Don't fuck around
Don't fuck around
Don't fuck around
With biddilly, biddilly
Biddilly the mountain
Eddie, are you kidding?
Eddie, are you kidding?
Oh i forgot to mention this is where we take our intermission.
We will see you in a few minutes
Thank you, we'll be back.