- 1
Adam Sandler - Bum Biddy
- 2
Adam Sandler - Forgetful Lucy
- 3
Adam Sandler - Grow Old With You
- 4
Adam Sandler - I Wanna Grow Old With You
- 5
Adam Sandler - What Do You Love
- 6
Adam Sandler - The Thanksgiving Song
- 7
Adam Sandler - Chris Farley Tribute
- 8
Adam Sandler - Yippie-Yo-Yo-Yea
- 9
Adam Sandler - Crazy Love
- 10
Adam Sandler - Dancing In The Dark
- 11
Adam Sandler - I Feel Pretty
- 12
Adam Sandler - Sex Or Weight Lifting
- 13
Adam Sandler - Somebody Kill Me
- 14
Adam Sandler - Assistant Principal's Big Day
- 15
Adam Sandler - At A Medium Pace
- 16
Adam Sandler - Hanukkah Song Part One
- 17
Adam Sandler - Let It Out, Davey
- 18
Adam Sandler - Medium Pace
- 19
Adam Sandler - Patch Song
- 20
Adam Sandler - Piece Of Shit Car
- 21
Adam Sandler - Real Love
- 22
Adam Sandler - She Comes Home To Me
- 23
Adam Sandler - Stan The Man
- 24
Adam Sandler - Thanksgiving Song
- 25
Adam Sandler - The Chanukah Song, Pt. 3 [radio Version]
- 26
Adam Sandler - The Peeper
- 27
Adam Sandler - 50 Ways To Get Bin Laden
- 28
Adam Sandler - 7 Foot Man
- 29
Adam Sandler - A Christmas Song
- 30
Adam Sandler - Assistant Principal's Big Day
- 31
Adam Sandler - At The Mall
- 32
Adam Sandler - At The Mall (feat. Kevin Grady)
- 33
Adam Sandler - Baby Got Jack
- 34
Adam Sandler - Back 2 School
- 35
Adam Sandler - Bad Boyfriend
- 36
Adam Sandler - Best Friend
- 37
Adam Sandler - Billy Madison's Victory Song
- 38
Adam Sandler - Buddy
- 39
Adam Sandler - Buddy[moving Train]
- 40
Adam Sandler - Calling Home
- 41
Adam Sandler - Camp Granada
- 42
Adam Sandler - Chanukah Song (III)
- 43
Adam Sandler - Cock N Balls
- 44
Adam Sandler - Cool Guy 1
- 45
Adam Sandler - Cool Guy 2
- 46
Adam Sandler - Cool Guy 3
- 47
Adam Sandler - Cool Guy 4
- 48
Adam Sandler - Cool Guy 5
- 49
Adam Sandler - Cordurory Blues
- 50
Adam Sandler - Corduroy Blues
- 51
Adam Sandler - Creapin´ On The Mayor
- 52
Adam Sandler - Dancin' And Pantsin
- 53
Adam Sandler - Davey's Song
- 54
Adam Sandler - Dee Wee (My Friend the Massive Idiot)
- 55
Adam Sandler - Dip Doodle
- 56
Adam Sandler - Do It For Your Mama
- 57
Adam Sandler - Dream On
- 58
Adam Sandler - Eggs And Candy (Snl)
- 59
Adam Sandler - Fatty McGee
- 60
Adam Sandler - Fleiznavidad
- 61
Adam Sandler - Food Innuendo Guy
- 62
Adam Sandler - Four Years Old
- 63
Adam Sandler - Funny Happy Birthday Song
- 64
Adam Sandler - Gay Robot
- 65
Adam Sandler - Girl
- 66
Adam Sandler - Hanukkah
- 67
Adam Sandler - I Feel Pretty(Anger Managment)
- 68
Adam Sandler - I Like Small Butts
- 69
Adam Sandler - I Ran Over The Taco Bell Dog
- 70
Adam Sandler - I Will Go Back To School
- 71
Adam Sandler - I'm So Wasted
- 72
Adam Sandler - Im Not
- 73
Adam Sandler - Instead of one day of presents
- 74
Adam Sandler - Intervention Song
- 75
Adam Sandler - Joining The Cult
- 76
Adam Sandler - Kermet and Big Bird Stoned
- 77
Adam Sandler - Knocking Heaven's Door
- 78
Adam Sandler - Leabing Song Part II
- 79
Adam Sandler - Linda Song
- 80
Adam Sandler - Listenin' To The Radio
- 81
Adam Sandler - Long Ago
- 82
Adam Sandler - Love Stinks
- 83
Adam Sandler - Lunchlady Land
- 84
Adam Sandler - Masturbata
- 85
Adam Sandler - Memory Lane
- 86
Adam Sandler - Mother's Day Song
- 87
Adam Sandler - Moyda
- 88
Adam Sandler - Mr. Bake-O
- 89
Adam Sandler - Mr. Spindel's Phone Call
- 90
Adam Sandler - My Little Chicken
- 91
Adam Sandler - Ode To My Car
- 92
Adam Sandler - Oh Mom...
- 93
Adam Sandler - Operaman
- 94
Adam Sandler - Pibb Goes Surfing
- 95
Adam Sandler - Pibb Tries The Skateboarding
- 96
Adam Sandler - Pickin' Daisies
- 97
Adam Sandler - Red Hooded Sweatshirt
- 98
Adam Sandler - Respect
- 99
Adam Sandler - Right Field
- 100
Adam Sandler - Santa Song
- 101
Adam Sandler - Secret
- 102
Adam Sandler - Sid & Alex
- 103
Adam Sandler - Sloppy Joe
- 104
Adam Sandler - Station 69
- 105
Adam Sandler - Steve Polychronopolous
- 106
Adam Sandler - Stoned on Sesame Street
- 107
Adam Sandler - Sun Tan Lotion Song
- 108
Adam Sandler - Sweat Beatrice
- 109
Adam Sandler - Technical Foul
- 110
Adam Sandler - Teenage Love On The Phone
- 111
Adam Sandler - The Adventures Of The Cow
- 112
Adam Sandler - The Amazing Willy Wanker
- 113
Adam Sandler - The Beating Of A High School Bus Driver
- 114
Adam Sandler - The Beating Of A High School Janitor
- 115
Adam Sandler - The Beating Of A High School Science Teacher
- 116
Adam Sandler - The Beating Of A High School Spanish Teacher
- 117
Adam Sandler - The Beer Song
- 118
Adam Sandler - The Boss And The Secretary
- 119
Adam Sandler - The Buffoon And The Dean Of Admissions
- 120
Adam Sandler - The Buffoon And The Valedictorian
- 121
Adam Sandler - The Chanuka Song
- 122
Adam Sandler - The Chanukah Song
- 123
Adam Sandler - The Chanukah Song (II)
- 124
Adam Sandler - The Chanukah Song, Part II
- 125
Adam Sandler - The Chaunaka Song (Part 3)
- 126
Adam Sandler - The Cheerleader
- 127
Adam Sandler - The Excited Southerner At A Job Interview
- 128
Adam Sandler - The Excited Southerner Gets Pulled Over
- 129
Adam Sandler - The Excited Southerner Meets Mel Gibson
- 130
Adam Sandler - The Excited Southerner Orders A Meal
- 131
Adam Sandler - The Excited Southerner Proposes To A Girl
- 132
Adam Sandler - The Excited Southerner Proposes To A Woman
- 133
Adam Sandler - The Goat Song
- 134
Adam Sandler - The Grandma Song
- 135
Adam Sandler - The Hannukah Oing
- 136
Adam Sandler - The Hypnotist
- 137
Adam Sandler - The Hypnotist feat Kevin Nealon
- 138
Adam Sandler - The Lonesome Kicker
- 139
Adam Sandler - The Longest Pee
- 140
Adam Sandler - The Mayor Of Pussytown
- 141
Adam Sandler - The Mule Session
- 142
Adam Sandler - The Psychotic Legend of Uncle Donnie
- 143
Adam Sandler - The Respect Chant
- 144
Adam Sandler - The Taliban Can
- 145
Adam Sandler - They're All Gunna Laugh At You
- 146
Adam Sandler - Toll Booth Willie
- 147
Adam Sandler - Uses Of The Word Fuck
- 148
Adam Sandler - Voodoo
- 149
Adam Sandler - Ways To Get Bin Laden
- 150
Adam Sandler - Welcome My Son
- 151
Adam Sandler - What The Hell Happened To Me?
- 152
Adam Sandler - Whore! Where Are You?!
- 153
Adam Sandler - You Spin Me Right Round
- 154
Adam Sandler - Zittly Van Zittles
The Hypnotist
Adam Sandler
[Dr. Stewart:] Hi, [I'm] Dr. Stewart.
[Gary Phelps:] Hi, Dr. Stewart. Nice to meet you -- I'm Gary Phelps.
[Dr. Stewart:] My pleasure. Gary, have you ever been hypnotized before?
[Gary Phelps:] No, I haven't. I'm actually quite nervous, but I just, uh, I --
[Dr. Stewart:] All right, and you were referred to me by anyone...?
[Gary Phelps:] To be honest with you,
I saw your name in the Yellow Pages,
and It said you're good at this stuff, so I just,
I gotta give it a shot, just kick this whole cigarette thing...
[Dr. Stewart:] So smoking is your problem?
[Gary Phelps:] Yeah, I can't stop smoking and it's --
it's finally, like, affecting everything I do,
I can't run, I can't play basketball and all that stuff like that, so I,
I gotta give it up.
[Dr. Stewart:] How long have you smoked, Gary?
[Gary Phelps:] Uh, I started when I was eleven years old, and I just can't kick it, you know?
[Dr. Stewart:] Yeah, right. [small, barely noticeable fart]
All right, Gary, why don't you just have a seat here and sit down and just relax --
what I do is hypnosis.
[Gary Phelps:] Right.
[Dr. Stewart:] Basically I just want you to sit back and relax --
let yourself sit back and relax and sink into the chair, and ,
um, just feel comfortable and trust me.
[bigger fart]
[Gary Phelps: noticing fart sound] Uh...
[Dr. Stewart:] That's it.
[Gary Phelps:] O-kay....
[Dr. Stewart:] That's it.
[Gary Phelps:] That was...o-kay...
[Dr. Stewart:] All right? Okay. Gary, I want you to close your eyes,
and I just want you to again relax and try to concentrate on nothing.
Okay? That's it. Now I'm gonna count backwards from five to zero --
[Gary Phelps:] Right.
[Dr. Stewart:] -- and I just want you to relax, and you're going to fall into a deep state of mind --
of subconsciousness -- you're very comfortable,
I'll be counting back from five, I just want you to relax,
and just think of nothing.
[three farts in succession]
[Gary Phelps:] Are you gonna keep doing that, or...?
[Dr. Stewart:] Hmm? Just concentrate now. That's it.
Close your eyes. Keep your eyes closed. Okay. Now.
We're very comfortable.
Five [small fart], we're thinking of nothing except being comfortable
and nothing's bothering us. Okay.
When I say the word "relax," listen to me, you're sinking, you're sinking, [medium fart]
[Gary Phelps:] Oh my god...that was, uh....are you gonna keep doing that?
[Dr. Stewart:] Please just try to relax; that wasn't me. Okay.
You're very stressed -- you're very stressed.
Okay, four, we're relaxing, we're relaxing, you're very comfortable,
you're very, very soothed. Okay. Four, three...[fart]
[Gary Phelps:] Oh my dear god, sir...uh, I can't...
[Dr. Stewart:] That was the couch. I know it sounded like -- it's --
the vinyl -- it's a new couch -- please, just try and concentrate.
Okay. And we're very sleepy, we're relaxed, thinking nothing bothers us,
nothing bothers us -- [several farts]
[Gary Phelps:] Uh, um, all right, could you open a window, maybe?
I'm just having a tough time concentrating --
[Dr. Stewart:] Hmm? Here we go -- there, there, we're relaxing, we're relaxing
[fart and cough together] three, two, two --
[Gary Phelps:] I was just going to ask you if you could maybe stop doing that.
I can't concentrate when you're doing that.
[Dr. Stewart:] This is what I do. It's a counting-down thing.
We're relaxing now. Just relax -- let it go,
don't focus on anything else, just concentrate on what we're doing here.
Three, two, relax, relax, that's it, just relax [fart], we're relaxing now --
[Gary Phelps:] Okay -- you're gonna -- that one was --
it's getting a little irritating --
[Dr. Stewart:] Hang on just a second here.
Let me just step out a second here.
[Gary Phelps:] That'd be good.
[Dr. Stewart:] All right, and we're relaxing,
as I leave, we're relaxing, still relaxing,
[fart in the distance]
[Gary Phelps:] Jesus...Oh my God.
[Dr. Stewart:] We're relaxing.
[Gary Phelps: trying hard not to laugh]
[Dr. Stewart:] Okay, I'm back, we're relaxing, and we're counting down,
we're to two, and all we're thinking about is healthy, fresh air.
Freshness. Breathing in. Breathing in deep, letting out. [fart]
[Gary Phelps:] Sir, I'd appreciate if you could stop 'letting it out'.
But okay, okay, fine, thank you.
[Dr. Stewart:] That's it, you're all right, everything's good.
All right, you feel very comfortable, you're sinking into the chair,
we're relaxing, one [long fart], and we're coming down to zero and --
[Gary Phelps:] Oh my god, uh...yes, all right, it was nothing...
[Dr. Stewart:] No, no, that time that was you.
[Gary Phelps:] That wasn't me!
[Dr. Stewart: We're not here to pick sides, we're not here to pick sides, that was you, and maybe we could deal with this in another session, but right now we're dealing with the smoking, and, um, let's not worry about anything else that's going down --
[Gary Phelps: OK, I've just gotta kick this habit.
[Dr. Stewart: Down to zero, relaxing, we're going to feel very fresh [fart], we're going to feel very healthy [fart], and let's take a nice, deep breath --
[Gary Phelps: I can't breathe, sir, uh, I'm sorry, I just -- ["squirty" fart]
[Gary Phelps: Oh my god -- what did you eat? It smells like baby food --
[Dr. Stewart:] All right, we're relaxing --
that one probably squirted out a little into the pants,
but we'll just continue with thte floating [fart] --
yeah, that was definitely a squirt --
but here we go, one, zero, we are under.
Are you relaxed?
[Gary Phelps:] Yeah, I'm under, I guess.
[Dr. Stewart:] Here we go, relaxing, relaxing.
You're under a deep trance, you will not smoke anymore,
you will just feel healthy from now on, and you'll be breathing in nothing
but fresh air, and you will not smell anything in this room, it wasn't me,
it wasn't me farting [fart] -- that was not me --
[Gary Phelps: hysterically laughing under his breath]
You're gonna have to stop doing that, sir. It's just very hard for me to listen to you when you're --
[Dr. Stewart:] You're floating now, you're high above, you're looking down,
nothing but fresh pastures and fields, and here we go [long fart]
[Gary Phelps:] Oh man...
[Dr. Stewart:] -- that was you,
[Gary Phelps:] That was not me, sir! I'm watching you!
[Dr. Stewart:] That was you, and when you wake up, you will not remember any of this, except that it was you, or my receptionist, don't worry, she gets it all the time. All right -- you smell nothing; I'm perfectly clean. I have no bad gas; it was all from outside or from -- from -- you yourself. And let's not forget the smoking thing that's why you're here. No smoking. Repeat after me: I am a smelly pig.
[Gary Phelps:] What?
[Dr. Stewart:] All right, we're moving along, and we;'re relaxed. [fart]
All right, and now we're going to count back up, up one to five,
[Gary Phelps:] OK, you know, I think this is fine, I don't want to smoke...
[Dr. Stewart:] Gary, settle down, relax, and when I get to five,
you will snap out of this, and you won't remember this,
especially the smell, the smell was from you.
All right? And here we go.
Zero, we're coming out of it, you're waking up slowly, your eyes are opening,
one, you're feeling good, and when you wake up,
you'll feel wide awake and perfect you'll feel whole and [fart] all-righty,
I ripped that one out there and I apologize.
I ripped a good one there. That was a nice out..
[Gary Phelps:] That was not nice.
[Dr. Stewart:] Here we go, and, we're coming right [fart]
[Gary Phelps:] What was that?
[Dr. Stewart:] That was three.
[Gary Phelps:] It didn't sound like three.
[Dr. Stewart:] three, I'm counting, and four, it's no smell in here, and you don't smoke, you don't want a cigarette, no, and here we go [fart] five, and -- [snap] Do you want a cigarette?
[Gary Phelps:] No I don't.
[Dr. Stewart:] Then my job is done.
[Gary Phelps: bursts into laughter]
[Dr. Stewart: fart] Please leave the door open as you leave. [fart]
[Gary Phelps:] OK, thank you, Doctor.
[typing resumes and another fart is heard]